@hagroden Thank you for your character submission! First off, I really like how you incorporated the side effects of being Fragmented into Breck's social difficulties. It's a great example of how being Fragmented can impact you even before you become Reunited or Lost, and I'm glad you took advantage of it.
Small detail, but important: Fragmented marks only appear on the
right wrist. So if Breck lost his right arm, his Fragmented mark is just gone, won't reappear on his left wrist or anything like that. His Reunited mark, however,
will appear somewhere on his existing body when he finds his soulmate. Along that same vein, it's not quite plausible for Breck's family not to have considered him being Fragmented; while it is very rare, doctors all over the world are aware of it, and would see the signs and explain the situation to the parent(s) when a Fragmented child is born. It also would be noted on his birth certificate, medical records and any other official identification, such as his passport and driver's licence/state ID (or whatever Americans have in place of a driver's licence for ID when people can't drive).
While I like the character concept, I have to admit that his education and business, well, you're squeezing a
lot into 25 years. I'm also a bit concerned about his company specifically, since it does clash with some existing world lore. I'd love to talk to you over discord if you would, so we can discuss more easily ^_^
Vixere,
RoadkilBanana,
Achronum,
AlteredTundra,
Vesnic,
Kronshi,
puddingpunter,
Asura,
FulgrimLives,
Zer0Solution
Member