Member
Moon Child
canaryrose
Stryder BC
SpicyMeatball
IAmTheIsland
Sep
TokyoPewPew
Pathei Mathos
Azurian Dream
As he stood there, swallowing everything that was tugging at him to clap back at her, Kavi instead took it because he was better than that. He was better than the 2018 Kavi Salvador that might’ve said something underhanded that was only said out loud to bring out some kind of reaction out of her. He wasn’t that guy anymore. It didn’t matter to him if the entire school was against him nor did it matter to him.
“Right.” His response came out neutral and mostly without feeling. Kavi stopped the thought that wanted to come out and smiled. “Well, you look nice. So you have that going for you tonight at least,” he noted, keeping his eyes on her dark eyes. Those same eyes that had always been his weakness were now something that glared at him with such a disdain it brought him back to Santiago’s party at the start of last semester when she had her first freak out on him. Going from then to dating to where they were now, he often wondered what domino effect must’ve been in place to lead them to this very moment.
Leaning back on the table, Ariel rolled her eyes. She didn’t have time for fluff or fake compliments. She was done biting her tongue and filtering what she had to say.
”What do you want, Kavi? I know you didn’t come over here just to have a boring conversation and hand out compliments.”
”And what if that’s exactly what I wanted to do?” He asked her, staring her dead in her eyes. ”I mean, am I not allowed to acknowledge when you are a stone-cold fox anymore? Did I forego that right when it was decided we weren’t boyfriend and girlfriend?” Kavi knew he was being just a smidge overdramatic. Perhaps his time with King’s own drama queen was rubbing off on him. Or perhaps he was slowly easing his way into letting out all of what he buried the minute Ariel asked for the break.
”Oh please,” she scoffed, taking another sip of her drink. ”We both know that I was never really your type. But congrats on landing Chrissie! She’s a total knockout and I’m sure you two will get along fabulously.” Looking him up and down once again, she pursed her lips before speaking again. ”Maybe don’t let her dress you next time though.”
Yeah, you weren’t my type but that didn’t stop me from falling for you. Safe to say her comment actually stung and the decisive blow of him giving a shit anymore came when she mentioned Chrissie. It was in usual Ariel Grey fashion. She knew she liked him and he knew she knew he was heads over heels for her as well, but the one thing about his ex that didn’t always have an attractive appearance was her not-so-subtle way of projecting her jealousy into a hardly passive-aggressive attitude. He knew this about her because despite everything, Kavi paid attention to the things that mattered. Like right now, he knew she was moments away from blowing a gasket because she was tightening her fists in the same way she did when she broke up with him. He knew she was already at her limit because of how many times she took a sip from her solo cup. “Well don’t stop there, Ariel. Go on! Tell me how you really feel since you obviously got something to say.” No, Kavi don’t do that. It’s peace you’re trying to maintain. “But hey, maybe Great Value Kavi is rubbing off on you and you’ve lost the fire that made you stand out in a crowd.” Well, it’s not like he was good at peace talks. Bring on the war, baby!
”Don’t you even think about dragging Kavan into this,” Ariel said, her voice dripping with acid. Her left hand gripping her drink cup, she raised the right one, pointing a finger at the taller boy. ‘Great Value Kavi’? What kind of shit?! Kavan was nothing like Kavi. ”You don’t get to waltz over here and pretend like you want to have a semi-normal conversation with me in front of all these people to make yourself look like the good guy. You haven’t dared to message me in weeks, yet you want to conversate with me at the first school related thing we’re both forced in to?”
Ariel was fully aware that she was the one to call it quits and that Kavi didn’t owe her anything. It wouldn’t have killed him to answer a text or two though. ”I just don’t understand why out of all of these people - out of the whole senior class - you approach me? Why me, Kavi?” she asked, echoing her inner most thoughts. ‘Why me’ was a question that had been coming to mind a lot here lately. Maybe Kavi could shed some light on an answer for her.
“You seriously have no idea how hard it’s been for me, do you?” That was the first thing Kavi said and it was put out there before he even had a chance to think about it, but when it was, he took in a deep breath and continued, “I know, you’ll probably say ‘well look at how you were acting!? You have no idea how hard it’s been for me to be consistently humiliated by you’. And, fine, you’re right. I have no idea what it’s like, Ariel. I can’t possibly understand what it’s like inside that head of yours. I will never presume to understand how you feel or what you think on a day to day basis.” If she knew him at all, Kavi knew Ariel knew there was a but on its way. He took in a momentary breathe, letting shaking arms relax themselves a bit before continuing. “Listen, I get it. I know I could have texted or called or whatever’d you, but just because you decided we needed to take a break didn’t stop me from still loving you.”
For the second time, Kavi hadn’t realized what he just said until he took a moment to quietly reflect. When he did, he took a step back, looking first down at his hands as they tightened into loose fists. As he relaxed them, his eyes were back on Ariel. He inhaled and tried to relax himself, tried to give himself something to not make a slip of the tongue again. He hated putting himself out there when there was no guarantee that it wasn’t for nothing, but whenever he was near Ariel, he couldn’t help but feel exposed.
A wave of shock hit Ariel so forcefully that she would have sworn it nearly knocked her down. All of the things that Kavi did, all of the things that he had said - Ariel had all but chalked it up to him not loving her. He was always known for having a girl on his arm, and why Ariel had ever thought herself to be different, she didn’t know.
Turning away from him and tossing her cup in the trash in a basketball like fashion, Ariel grabbed yet another drink from the fountain. Taking her time with it so as to not look at Kavi, she took a moment to think. Eyebrows knit together in obvious confusion, the red head turned back around to do her best at looking him in the eye.
”It didn’t change it for me either but… I couldn’t put up with it anymore, Kavi. I couldn’t put up with you. I could have handled looking like a fool for a little longer if you had actually meant what you said on Christmas Eve. But that first day back at school with you calling Chanel a bitch and turning on Rye like that I just… it really didn’t make me think that you meant it. I’ve told you time and time again that you can’t just keep making me empty promises.” At this point Ariel wasn’t even sure if she was making sense. The alcohol was getting to her, and Kavi’s confessions were helping nothing. ”But it’s okay now!” she said with her best fake enthusiasm. ”You’re working to become the man you want to be, and you’re free of anyone - including me - holding you back. This isn’t a sitcom. I’m not Rachel, and you’re not Ross - you don’t owe me anything. I said for us to take a break because I just have so much shit going on right now and you aren’t helping. You weren’t helping and you standing here is just making it worse. I’ve drank and I’ve smoked and I’ve danced and I’ve written shit and I was just nearly over all this bullshit and now here you are again.”
Kavi knew he was faced with a choice. He knew what Ariel wanted him to do: to walk away and leave her in whatever half-drunk state she was in. He knew this because unlike others he had been with, he cared enough for her to know those little tidbits about her that not everyone knew. So many times in the past, Kavi had always walked away from would-be relationships. It happened with countless girls that he couldn’t remember their names. But Ariel was always different. He fought for her more times than a younger, selfish version of Kavi Salvador would have. In the past, he would have just given up after the first freak out, but time and time again, he kept coming back.
“Yes, here I am again.” Kavi felt that repeating it back to her might give him an answer or two, but all it did was make him angry that he didn’t know why. “I guess there’s no real point in saying anything now. I told you I still love you but that won’t make any difference, will it, Ariel? No amount of grand confessions or ‘empty promises’ (as you put it) will change things because you have already decided that I’m better off without you.” Kavi let out a sigh.
Pursing her lips, Ariel nodded her head as she looked towards the ceiling, quickly blinking away the forming tears of confusion. ”I don’t know what you want me to do,” she said hopelessly. ”I thought that maybe if we took a break we could think things over and it would be better.” Shrugging her shoulders, Ariel took her millionth drink for the night, the slight burn of the vodka no longer existent in her throat. ”But all I know is that you still love me and I still love you and it’s taking everything in me to not just walk to your house at three am, ask for forgiveness or whatever and be the fool again. I feel like I’m going insane - and not just because of you. There’s Trillian and the whole thing with my mom being dead and how my life is coming together and falling apart at the same time and everything is so, so confusing and then there’s you, Kavi. There’s always you. So tell me what you want from me so I can finally scratch off one of the many things from my list. Please.”
If he was paying attention at all, Kavi would see how sincere she was really being. It wasn’t that Ariel had lost her fire - she was just tired. What little buzz she had conjured was gone, and all that was left was the side of her that was pleading for an answer.
For whatever reason, while everyone around him was experiencing the best moments of their high school lives with those they knew they were going to spend their lives with, Kavi kept going around in circles, repeating the same mistakes and hardly learning from them. The person he had professed his love to multiple times or swore to be this or that ended up getting burned every time. He never intended to hurt her, but nevertheless, his actions had consequences.
“I guess I don’t know what I want.” Maybe that was the truth or perhaps it was him trying to not be selfish for once. He could say she was what he wanted. He could tell her that ever since they broke up, no matter who came at him, there was never any question who had his attention or who met more to him than Ariel Grey. But it was clear to him he was doing more harm to her mental health than anything else. And the last thing he wanted to do was be the reason she cried. “Sorry for bothering you. I’ll leave you be.” He gave her a minimal wave. “Hope you enjoy the dance,” he said, turning away in an attempt to go back to the dancefloor.
”Kavi,” she called out, reaching forward to grab him by the arm. ”I’m sorry. Really - I am.”
He smiled back at her, shaking his head. “Don’t be. You’re doing what you know is best for you.” As strange as it was, he didn’t feel sad or anything close to it. Truth be told, Kavi was happy for Ariel for focusing on herself and what she thought was best for her. If that meant being without him for a while, he could accept that. He gave it his best shot, but at the end of the day, what she needed wasn’t a proclamation of his love for her but just space. “I mean it. Don’t feel guilty for putting yourself first. You deserve to be happy, Ariel.”
Love was a complicated thing. While Ariel needed space from Kavi, and he needed space from her - they both still loved each other. Maybe at another time and place things would have worked out differently. Perhaps they’d both have their shit worked out and they would compliment each other rather than fighting all the time. Standing on her tiptoes to give him a peck on the cheek, Ariel let go of his arm and looked him in the eye one last time.
”Just know that I’m still here if you need anything, yeah?” Slapping an academy award-winning fake smile on her face, Ariel did her best to sound a little more upbeat. ”Now go enjoy the rest of your night!”
He didn’t know how he could but for her, he’d do anything. “You better have fun too!” He flashed her one last smile before disappearing into the dancefloor, his attire proving to be beneficial to him because the soft watermelon pink had blended in with the pinks and reds originating from the disco ball that hung above.
“Right.” His response came out neutral and mostly without feeling. Kavi stopped the thought that wanted to come out and smiled. “Well, you look nice. So you have that going for you tonight at least,” he noted, keeping his eyes on her dark eyes. Those same eyes that had always been his weakness were now something that glared at him with such a disdain it brought him back to Santiago’s party at the start of last semester when she had her first freak out on him. Going from then to dating to where they were now, he often wondered what domino effect must’ve been in place to lead them to this very moment.
Leaning back on the table, Ariel rolled her eyes. She didn’t have time for fluff or fake compliments. She was done biting her tongue and filtering what she had to say.
”What do you want, Kavi? I know you didn’t come over here just to have a boring conversation and hand out compliments.”
”And what if that’s exactly what I wanted to do?” He asked her, staring her dead in her eyes. ”I mean, am I not allowed to acknowledge when you are a stone-cold fox anymore? Did I forego that right when it was decided we weren’t boyfriend and girlfriend?” Kavi knew he was being just a smidge overdramatic. Perhaps his time with King’s own drama queen was rubbing off on him. Or perhaps he was slowly easing his way into letting out all of what he buried the minute Ariel asked for the break.
”Oh please,” she scoffed, taking another sip of her drink. ”We both know that I was never really your type. But congrats on landing Chrissie! She’s a total knockout and I’m sure you two will get along fabulously.” Looking him up and down once again, she pursed her lips before speaking again. ”Maybe don’t let her dress you next time though.”
Yeah, you weren’t my type but that didn’t stop me from falling for you. Safe to say her comment actually stung and the decisive blow of him giving a shit anymore came when she mentioned Chrissie. It was in usual Ariel Grey fashion. She knew she liked him and he knew she knew he was heads over heels for her as well, but the one thing about his ex that didn’t always have an attractive appearance was her not-so-subtle way of projecting her jealousy into a hardly passive-aggressive attitude. He knew this about her because despite everything, Kavi paid attention to the things that mattered. Like right now, he knew she was moments away from blowing a gasket because she was tightening her fists in the same way she did when she broke up with him. He knew she was already at her limit because of how many times she took a sip from her solo cup. “Well don’t stop there, Ariel. Go on! Tell me how you really feel since you obviously got something to say.” No, Kavi don’t do that. It’s peace you’re trying to maintain. “But hey, maybe Great Value Kavi is rubbing off on you and you’ve lost the fire that made you stand out in a crowd.” Well, it’s not like he was good at peace talks. Bring on the war, baby!
”Don’t you even think about dragging Kavan into this,” Ariel said, her voice dripping with acid. Her left hand gripping her drink cup, she raised the right one, pointing a finger at the taller boy. ‘Great Value Kavi’? What kind of shit?! Kavan was nothing like Kavi. ”You don’t get to waltz over here and pretend like you want to have a semi-normal conversation with me in front of all these people to make yourself look like the good guy. You haven’t dared to message me in weeks, yet you want to conversate with me at the first school related thing we’re both forced in to?”
Ariel was fully aware that she was the one to call it quits and that Kavi didn’t owe her anything. It wouldn’t have killed him to answer a text or two though. ”I just don’t understand why out of all of these people - out of the whole senior class - you approach me? Why me, Kavi?” she asked, echoing her inner most thoughts. ‘Why me’ was a question that had been coming to mind a lot here lately. Maybe Kavi could shed some light on an answer for her.
“You seriously have no idea how hard it’s been for me, do you?” That was the first thing Kavi said and it was put out there before he even had a chance to think about it, but when it was, he took in a deep breath and continued, “I know, you’ll probably say ‘well look at how you were acting!? You have no idea how hard it’s been for me to be consistently humiliated by you’. And, fine, you’re right. I have no idea what it’s like, Ariel. I can’t possibly understand what it’s like inside that head of yours. I will never presume to understand how you feel or what you think on a day to day basis.” If she knew him at all, Kavi knew Ariel knew there was a but on its way. He took in a momentary breathe, letting shaking arms relax themselves a bit before continuing. “Listen, I get it. I know I could have texted or called or whatever’d you, but just because you decided we needed to take a break didn’t stop me from still loving you.”
For the second time, Kavi hadn’t realized what he just said until he took a moment to quietly reflect. When he did, he took a step back, looking first down at his hands as they tightened into loose fists. As he relaxed them, his eyes were back on Ariel. He inhaled and tried to relax himself, tried to give himself something to not make a slip of the tongue again. He hated putting himself out there when there was no guarantee that it wasn’t for nothing, but whenever he was near Ariel, he couldn’t help but feel exposed.
A wave of shock hit Ariel so forcefully that she would have sworn it nearly knocked her down. All of the things that Kavi did, all of the things that he had said - Ariel had all but chalked it up to him not loving her. He was always known for having a girl on his arm, and why Ariel had ever thought herself to be different, she didn’t know.
Turning away from him and tossing her cup in the trash in a basketball like fashion, Ariel grabbed yet another drink from the fountain. Taking her time with it so as to not look at Kavi, she took a moment to think. Eyebrows knit together in obvious confusion, the red head turned back around to do her best at looking him in the eye.
”It didn’t change it for me either but… I couldn’t put up with it anymore, Kavi. I couldn’t put up with you. I could have handled looking like a fool for a little longer if you had actually meant what you said on Christmas Eve. But that first day back at school with you calling Chanel a bitch and turning on Rye like that I just… it really didn’t make me think that you meant it. I’ve told you time and time again that you can’t just keep making me empty promises.” At this point Ariel wasn’t even sure if she was making sense. The alcohol was getting to her, and Kavi’s confessions were helping nothing. ”But it’s okay now!” she said with her best fake enthusiasm. ”You’re working to become the man you want to be, and you’re free of anyone - including me - holding you back. This isn’t a sitcom. I’m not Rachel, and you’re not Ross - you don’t owe me anything. I said for us to take a break because I just have so much shit going on right now and you aren’t helping. You weren’t helping and you standing here is just making it worse. I’ve drank and I’ve smoked and I’ve danced and I’ve written shit and I was just nearly over all this bullshit and now here you are again.”
Kavi knew he was faced with a choice. He knew what Ariel wanted him to do: to walk away and leave her in whatever half-drunk state she was in. He knew this because unlike others he had been with, he cared enough for her to know those little tidbits about her that not everyone knew. So many times in the past, Kavi had always walked away from would-be relationships. It happened with countless girls that he couldn’t remember their names. But Ariel was always different. He fought for her more times than a younger, selfish version of Kavi Salvador would have. In the past, he would have just given up after the first freak out, but time and time again, he kept coming back.
“Yes, here I am again.” Kavi felt that repeating it back to her might give him an answer or two, but all it did was make him angry that he didn’t know why. “I guess there’s no real point in saying anything now. I told you I still love you but that won’t make any difference, will it, Ariel? No amount of grand confessions or ‘empty promises’ (as you put it) will change things because you have already decided that I’m better off without you.” Kavi let out a sigh.
Pursing her lips, Ariel nodded her head as she looked towards the ceiling, quickly blinking away the forming tears of confusion. ”I don’t know what you want me to do,” she said hopelessly. ”I thought that maybe if we took a break we could think things over and it would be better.” Shrugging her shoulders, Ariel took her millionth drink for the night, the slight burn of the vodka no longer existent in her throat. ”But all I know is that you still love me and I still love you and it’s taking everything in me to not just walk to your house at three am, ask for forgiveness or whatever and be the fool again. I feel like I’m going insane - and not just because of you. There’s Trillian and the whole thing with my mom being dead and how my life is coming together and falling apart at the same time and everything is so, so confusing and then there’s you, Kavi. There’s always you. So tell me what you want from me so I can finally scratch off one of the many things from my list. Please.”
If he was paying attention at all, Kavi would see how sincere she was really being. It wasn’t that Ariel had lost her fire - she was just tired. What little buzz she had conjured was gone, and all that was left was the side of her that was pleading for an answer.
For whatever reason, while everyone around him was experiencing the best moments of their high school lives with those they knew they were going to spend their lives with, Kavi kept going around in circles, repeating the same mistakes and hardly learning from them. The person he had professed his love to multiple times or swore to be this or that ended up getting burned every time. He never intended to hurt her, but nevertheless, his actions had consequences.
“I guess I don’t know what I want.” Maybe that was the truth or perhaps it was him trying to not be selfish for once. He could say she was what he wanted. He could tell her that ever since they broke up, no matter who came at him, there was never any question who had his attention or who met more to him than Ariel Grey. But it was clear to him he was doing more harm to her mental health than anything else. And the last thing he wanted to do was be the reason she cried. “Sorry for bothering you. I’ll leave you be.” He gave her a minimal wave. “Hope you enjoy the dance,” he said, turning away in an attempt to go back to the dancefloor.
”Kavi,” she called out, reaching forward to grab him by the arm. ”I’m sorry. Really - I am.”
He smiled back at her, shaking his head. “Don’t be. You’re doing what you know is best for you.” As strange as it was, he didn’t feel sad or anything close to it. Truth be told, Kavi was happy for Ariel for focusing on herself and what she thought was best for her. If that meant being without him for a while, he could accept that. He gave it his best shot, but at the end of the day, what she needed wasn’t a proclamation of his love for her but just space. “I mean it. Don’t feel guilty for putting yourself first. You deserve to be happy, Ariel.”
Love was a complicated thing. While Ariel needed space from Kavi, and he needed space from her - they both still loved each other. Maybe at another time and place things would have worked out differently. Perhaps they’d both have their shit worked out and they would compliment each other rather than fighting all the time. Standing on her tiptoes to give him a peck on the cheek, Ariel let go of his arm and looked him in the eye one last time.
”Just know that I’m still here if you need anything, yeah?” Slapping an academy award-winning fake smile on her face, Ariel did her best to sound a little more upbeat. ”Now go enjoy the rest of your night!”
He didn’t know how he could but for her, he’d do anything. “You better have fun too!” He flashed her one last smile before disappearing into the dancefloor, his attire proving to be beneficial to him because the soft watermelon pink had blended in with the pinks and reds originating from the disco ball that hung above.
