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Very well, where do I begin?

My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet.

My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament.

My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds - pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve, I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles.

There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking. I highly suggest you try it.

Most Recent Posts

Oh, and sidenote, you write what is honestly my favorite Batman ever. You've probably heard that a million times before but here you go, hear it again.




"Favorite ever" is... actually a new one. I've gotten my share of compliments over the years, but wow. That's just awesome.

Honestly I think the funniest thing about all this is that I'm not even a huge fan of the Punisher, I just wanted to try my hand at writing some John Woo shit.


Sometimes that makes for a better approach than getting a textbook expert on the character. Especially in a game like this, where everyone's supposed to be a new version of themselves. If I weren't so dead-set on hijacking every possible game I'm in with a new version of Batman, playing someone whose mythos I'm unfamiliar with would actually be pretty tempting in this setting. I can't see playing The Hulk in a non-UOU game, for instance, but playing him here would be alot less intimidating.

Then again, I'm not really a risk-taker. If I'm not playing Batman, I'm usually playing someone else within my wheelhouse. IE: the famous superheroes that damn near everybody knows.

Again, choosing these were incredibly difficult, and I would have loved to spread the love around to many more individuals. But I'm sure that there'll be another session of awards before the season ends, and I'm gonna try not to repeat myself. So... here are my first set of kudos, I guess? I don't know. Take the damn compliments!

Best Character: @HenryJonesJr's Spider-Woman
I think everyone in the game adores the shit out of Gwen in this game, and I'm not ashamed to admit that her posts are probably the ones I anticipate reading the most. HJJ's not only managed to circumvent any expectations I had of simply transferring the Spider-Gwen concept over to a new universe, he's done the impossible - he's made me give less than an iota of a shit that Peter Parker isn't under the mask. Gwen feels as authentically befitting of the great power/great responsibility mantra as Pete did whenever he first donned the webs, but with a new perspective that gives her soap opera antics a renewed sense of energy and intrigue. We've all seen Parker bemoan his many girl troubles and the health of his elderly aunt, but Gwen has the weight of worrying about a cop father and the tremendous guilt of hiding a tragic secret from her best friend-turned-boyfriend ontop of a gang war sweeping the underbelly of New York. Gwen doesn't always manage to win out, like her male 616 counterpart, but she takes it all in stride and gets back up with more determination than ever. Henry deserves all the credit in the world for creating a new version of this concept that feels like it's best ever, and a version I'd happily buy a comic of every month.

Best Character Concept: @Simple Unicycle's Punisher
It's hard to really re-invent a character like Frank Castle without it seeming dumb - the comics have tried everything from making him a literal angel of death, sticking him in the body of a black man, and even killing him off and sewing him back up into Frankenstein. Simple Unicycle's version of Frank is the best full-on reinterpretation I think I've ever seen, recontextualizing a character that often appears as hollow and soulless (by intention) into someone who almost psychotically thrives on the pain he inflicts on others while also making him a bonafide action star in the vein of John Wick, not to mention a John Woo protagonist. Combined with Simp's ability to write some brutal-ass fight sequences (I especially loved the Nightclub one that preluded his conflict with Spider-Woman), and this may be the most enjoyable Punisher I've read in a long while. Kudos, man.

Best Character Development: @AndyC's Superman
This may have been the hardest one for me to narrow down, given so many of us are still in the primordial stages of our characters. For instance, I haven't even started developing Batman beyond a few basic characteristics because of how long this opening arc has taken me to write. But if I had to choose one character that's been a joy to watch develop and grow over the course of the game, the fact that Andy has managed to convey such a thing with Superman in such a short period of time makes this nomination a shoe-in. Starting as a well-meaning scrapper who didn't seem to know what the hell he was doing, the real hero that Clark is capable of being has been bubbling under the surface of every post Andy's written ever since his introduction, to the point that having him intervene in the current Surfer arc feels like a natural progression of Superman's character rather than just an obligatory appearance from comics' first big hitter. And without giving any details away, the stuff that he and I have planned for the World's Finest in the future leaves me pretty goddamn excited. It's no small feat to say Andy is the best Superman player I've ever seen over many interpretations spread across many games, but considering this version feels both true to the character and fresh at the same time, it's true. It's damn true.

Best Story: @Byrd Man - John Constantine's L.A. Misadventures
I've known Byrd since he was cutting his teeth in the original Hype games, and have watched him mature into one of the best writers I've ever worked with. I know fully well that he's capable of knocking shit out of the park with relative ease. That being said, his Constantine has been such a delight for me to read that I couldn't narrow down just one particular arc and had to include the whole lot. Combining genuine supernatural horror with alot of true crime and a dash of black humor laced in practically every scene John appears in himself, Byrd's really done some of his best work in awhile with this game and I couldn't be happier. It's actually made me incredibly glad that he didn't go with his concept for the Green Lantern Corps, as it would've robbed us of such great material with the Brit. Motherfucker is always my go-to standard for writing crime stories, as I've tried to interject a bit of Byrd with my Gotham stuff in this game. You might say that when it comes to crime fiction in these games, Byrd... is the word. *Yeeeeeah!*

Best Post: New Frontier In Ruins by @Morden Man
I said it whenever I began to read the IC from the beginning, but I don't think I emphasized how important reading this post was for me. This was the post that not only cemented Morden in my mind as a player to be envious of, but the post to make me realize the level of quality the game was in for - thereby validating my choice to come forward with the game's pitch in the first place. Reading the immensely powerful loss of the Richards' former world (in a brilliant twist, from a former game) made me feel alot of different things. Excitement, largely, but also a pulse-pounding intensity and heartbreak for the Four's plight as they were forced to leave their world behind, even at the expense of their greatest enemy-turned-ally in Doctor Doom. Every post since has been great aswell, but this opener felt like a true cinematic experience come to life in text form. I've often thought about how I'd try my hand at the FF if given the chance, but have had serious reservations, as I'm probably the least knowledgeable about Marvel's first family. Morden's run has made me realize that I never want to even try, because if I dared attempt it, I'd be forced to compare myself to his run. And I don't want to bring that on myself, because I'd lose every. single. time.

The John Lees Memorial MVP Award: @Lord Wraith
I'm of a firm mind that an RPG thrives on a healthy OOC thread just as much as an active IC thread, and if I had to choose one player who stands out for being a great presence outside of the game, it's Wraith. Never afraid to poke fun at anyone, including himself, he always lightens the mood considerably whenever things seem at their most tense and really makes my task as GM alot easier. There are alot of people that also help to smooth things out, such as my Co-GMs, but Wraith is an all-around cool dude who seems capable of getting along with everyone regardless of the circumstances. I think that if he wasn't around, keeping the game going even this long would've been a real struggle.
I can answer that. Scott Kollins drew the issue Sep posted a page from, and while the man's a pretty amazing artist on most of DC's characters and my second favorite Flash artist ever behind Francis Manupal, he has always sucked at drawing Batman for whatever reason. He draws the cowl all wrong, the cape is usually off, he adds unnessescary spikes to the suit. He just never draws a Batman that's on the level with the rest of his characters.

Regarding awards, my thanks goes out for the nominations I've recieved so far. I'm still trying to figure mine out, since there's alot of competition in each category, but I'll widdle it down and post them soon.
This. Just because they are the big three in other media, does not necessarily mean they must be the same here. Especially when one is a different person in the tiara, and another is a mentally unstable myth that doesn't possess the same uber tactical mind as the original.


I resent that! I may be crazy, but I'm at least I'm a refreshing can of Diet Coke!



Also, once again, I must express my apologies for not being around as much this week. Still down with the sickness, literally, though I am taking medication to get it out of my system within the next few days. I'm not even gonna be a dick and steal the 200th post, I'm so out of it.

As far as The Silver Surfer event goes, I'm pretty much in agreement with @Morden Man about wrapping it up sooner rather than later. We ran it a little longer than intended and will have to close out this first part near the beginning of August, so it'd be best to leave any remaining interactions for the second event. My next post as The Surfer is probably gonna wrap things up for the first (aswell as give everyone a major clue about who his master is).

Also, just to give everyone fair warning, I may end up on the Weekly Post Check myself due to inactivity as Batman. I just can't focus on writing between meds and horrible chest coughing. I refuse to go over the two week limit, but I haven't been counting my Surfer posts towards my activity in the game overall, so fair is fair.
You people thought I forgot, didn't you?

Well, shame on you for being right. Damn bronchitis...

The Weekly Post Check. At this point, I think introducing the concept of what this is has become a bit redundant, so let's get things out of the way now - @Inkarnate, @Afro Samurai, and @GreenGrenade have all informed me that they still intend to partake in the game, so I'm going to be lenient on them and give all three an extra week to play catch-up despite being over the limit. After that, they'll always be free to re-apply as their characters, no muss, no fuss.

But I can only do this so many times, so I only ask that if you can't post, at least be open about your participation level as they have. That's all I really need to know to still count you as in. As Byrd said in a recent post, if you're silent and go over, you're immediately out.

Okay. Now onto the others.

7 Days Left (7 To Go)
@Nightrunner
@Lord Wraith

Annnd... that's it. A fantastic improvement on last week, and I'm happy that productivity is up again. Keep up the good work.

As for Wraith and Nightrunner, who I see have promised to get posts up in the near future... I'd recommend doing just that.


<Snipped quote by Lord Wraith>

I mean, I have no problem believing that Teen Titans Go! is very good at what it's trying to be. The "problem," for lack of a better term, is that what it's trying to be is not what fans like us want. The problem behind the problem is that fans like us don't drive merchandise sales, so what we want is worth fuck and all.


Sadly inaccurate. Because to WB, what we want is worth "Fuck" and "Batman". In that order and combined into a sentence.

That said, I actually like Teen Titans Go. It's a ridiculously fun show that doesn't try and pass itself off as a legitimate version of the material, and gets by with alot on those merits.

Is it the original cartoon? No, but Young Justice does a good job of filling the void for both that and the DCAU, in my opinion. So TTG! is harmless. And occasionally really funny, if you give it a chance.
The plane was pretty distant when Surfer blew up the wing, so I could see it falling over a populated area. Long as Andy knows where he is when he approaches The Surfer, since he and Iris haven't left the Badlands.

And in case nobody noticed until now, since I never really said anything, me, Byrd, and Morden are co-writing The Surfer on a turn based rotation. We figured that was only fair to prevent The Surfer as being counted as a second character for me, to keep the flow of the event going, and to allow me to concentrate on writing Batman, my actual character. So... yeah. Byrd will be writing the next response, Morden will jump in after, I'll be writing the third, ect, ect. until the end of the event.
I'm so far behind on these shows and maybe it's a bit of the medicine I'm taking right now talking, but... those trailers for Flash and Arrow didn't look like total garbage. Usually even in the trailers I can tell whether to skip it or not, and these didn't give me a bad vibe. I actually really like the premise of both seasons, with Oliver being in prison and Barry and Iris having to deal with their time-displaced daughter. Add to the fact that Batwoman and Gotham City are coming into the fold and I'm actually pretty intrigued.

Or maybe "Fuck Batman" lowered my expectations. I don't know.

Just a head's up, I'm sick with what seems to be the beginnings of bronchitis and won't be around much for the next few days. I defer all major game decisions to @Byrd Man and @Morden Man.

God help all of you.



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