Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by KaiserElectric
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KaiserElectric Spaghetti Enthusiast

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COMMENTING TIME

@Dead Cruiser Hmm...I like the concept of over the top power but I think it goes a little too far. You do define her weakness, ie surviving long enough to easily counter, but I don't really see a way to outlast her given her versatile moveset and having her speed and strength so high. The concept is still pretty fun sounding but I think you should tune up the weakness to match the strength.

I don't want to dictate how you make the character, but I would suggest adding to the weaknesses that she telegraphs her moves really obviously (like with over the top windups and loudly calling out her attacks). Your call in the end though, still excited to see what she can do!

@Pirouette What a woobie. I like her a lot but I'm shaky on the permanency of her Death and Decay super. I'm fine with debilitating effects on moves like Acid Bomb since they can still do short term damage without the long term effects implied, but you specify that the damage is permanent, which doesn't really work for this genre. If you want to have it work that way on regular non-Nomad opponents that's fine but I'd rather it not do that long term damage against other PCs.

Otherwise her moveset is just peachy and I'll accept her once the change is made. ^^

@DracoLunaris No complaints here, he looks great! Though I personally would have moved Embrace Ancestry and Ancestral Mantle to the fighting style section, since it's more talking about his style then actual special moves, that's more on my style then on you. Accepted!
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Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Lmpkio
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@redbaron1234 What do you think of my character?

(And I suppose the others as well?)
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Savo
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Lets get down to reviewing... to defeat... the huns.

Did they send me normies... when I asked... for nomads?


@Lmpkio as usual, the story, age and everything checks out. So far. No complaints here... or rather, it's impossible to come up with any. Regardless, moving on to fighting style...

I don't think I was clear since most of his moveset has stayed the same, save for like a new move that was added. I was also asking for a moveset alteration as well with the idea... to a certain degree since it looks like he still has access to all his moves... or maybe he doesn't and it now depends on the element he's in? Either way, that either makes me think he's a lot my gimped or still retains the same power as before. My apologies for not being clear.

Lets use your elemental slashes as an example and change them up a bit to show you what I meant.

Wu Xing Slash
A slash that changes to fit what element the user is utilizing at the moment.

Fire allows the user to send a wave of fire wave of fire towards his opponent. It goes quickly in the direction of the swipe and upon impact can cause severe fire damage if it hits an opponent. It can travel for very short distances in water before it extinguishes.

Water causes the blade's edge to become enveloped in high pressure streams of water. This makes a blade capable of breaking through rock and dirt at such pressures and can easily detach organic limbs on contract.

Air allows the user to produce a gust of wind that can knock back opponents and break through wooden walls with a single sword swing.

Earth has the user simply strike the ground hard with his sword and issues a small earthquake to stun and/or throw the opponent off. The shaking only lasts a second or two, but its strong force still can tip unbalanced opponents off. It also produces a small shockwave that can knock opponents within 2 meters off the ground, however any further and it doesn't effect the opponent.


While this does come off as sort changing your charys moveset in a way, it gives him access to all his current moves (just not at the same time) and allows you to add more moves if you wish. It also goes into play over his meditation over altering his element. Depending on what element he is makes his play-style different or something and he plays around with adapting and so on and so forth. So far, I'm going to reject him so you can change his move set so that he doesn't seemingly have access to other moves, as well as give you some time to come up with more moves based on it all.


@Valor back to evaluating your machination of man. Once more, backstory and description are fine with the personality being a bit iffy, but easily overlooked for now, for now... but can I make one request? Could you make his age unspecified or vague? All things considered, this rp takes place sometime around 201X I would say and if you took his age... yeah, it would be around a certain era at the time.

Now onto your moveset. A fighter who just keeps on trucking along and is slow but tanky. I'm fine with his fighting style and how he beats people up for money, but I am a bit iffy on a few things. Living Metal for one... in fighting games, it's difficult to balance out healing... and he can either kick his healing up to eleven or let himself passively regenerate.

A suggestion I have is remove the passive regeneration. Instead, make it so when a chunk of him gets removed, he can go over it and begin reabsorbing it. This would, however make him vulnerable for the time if the person attacks him since they could knock it out of his hand. After battle regeneration I'm cool with, but maybe it was difficult to regenerate when on the battlefield or something? Just a thought for Living Metal.

Next is the shield which can deflect projectiles... after doing some discussing with a few others and some gms, it has come to the conclusion that this acts as a way to exploit his main weakness. Asking you to make him unable to move or attack or both seemed to be good at first until it was mentioned that he could basically stall out until they got into his range. I can't exactly figure out a way around this, but this removes options some zoners might have. Find a way to rework it or scrap it.

And the security systems... something tells me it can be used to bring things over to his side... how about limiting how many security systems he can hack, or something like that since he has a fragment? Maybe shooting, or hitting the orb could disarm it or something? Just a thought.

Now onto the super which we have discussed on discord. You haven't specified a time in the list, but have told me a bit about it in discord, which was 30 minutes... which is a lot. Given his power and tankiness, give it a time limit like Aldous's move and make it 30... seconds. Does that sound reasonable enough?

Next is the other super move where he can summon five other dreadlords to help him, again given that you've described them as being there to shoot others, they are probably as tanky as him, and if they wanted to, easily fight as well as him. Proposition - give this a time limit as well and maybe make them weaker than Malus in terms of tankiness and melee attacks if they chose to attack like that?

Above all, he needs some changes. The character concept of him being a tank is good, but somethings will have to change before I can accept him. These changes do sound fair, no?


@A Lowly Wretch ok, for starters, please fix the formatting. Your hrs are still messed up due to the fact that they have a space in them as shown - [ hr]. Please fix that. Other than that, description and personality is good with a long ass backstory to boot. I'll give it a few read next time around, but I'm skimming it for now.

Lets move on to your moveset... which is strange since he lacks none in both areas. Basically, the uniqueness I'm guessing comes from training and being influenced by other nomads which is interesting as is. I'm fine with it all, save for the other descriptions in his fighting style. I have taken a look at them all and want them to be moved to the special moves section instead of acting as a free slot. Along with that, I've looked over his healing. Healing is an iffy thing in fighting, and right now I can't exactly think of a good way for him to change it.

So, yeah, I want you to change how his healing functions to an acceptable degree. I don't know what might be an acceptable degree like Malus or Aldous since they both have their own ways for going about it, so figure out a change that might look good for everyone.

Fix every thing I listed and give me another show because for now I'm going to have to reject him.


I'll be getting to the other four in a bit, just wanted to get this stuff posted up first.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Lmpkio
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I don't think I was clear since most of his moveset has stayed the same, save for like a new move that was added. I was also asking for a moveset alteration as well with the idea... to a certain degree since it looks like he still has access to all his moves... or maybe he doesn't and it now depends on the element he's in? Either way, that either makes me think he's a lot my gimped or still retains the same power as before. My apologies for not being clear.

Lets use your elemental slashes as an example and change them up a bit to show you what I meant.

Wu Xing Slash
A slash that changes to fit what element the user is utilizing at the moment.

Fire allows the user to send a wave of fire wave of fire towards his opponent. It goes quickly in the direction of the swipe and upon impact can cause severe fire damage if it hits an opponent. It can travel for very short distances in water before it extinguishes.

Water causes the blade's edge to become enveloped in high pressure streams of water. This makes a blade capable of breaking through rock and dirt at such pressures and can easily detach organic limbs on contract.

Air allows the user to produce a gust of wind that can knock back opponents and break through wooden walls with a single sword swing.

Earth has the user simply strike the ground hard with his sword and issues a small earthquake to stun and/or throw the opponent off. The shaking only lasts a second or two, but its strong force still can tip unbalanced opponents off. It also produces a small shockwave that can knock opponents within 2 meters off the ground, however any further and it doesn't effect the opponent.


While this does come off as sort changing your charys moveset in a way, it gives him access to all his current moves (just not at the same time) and allows you to add more moves if you wish. It also goes into play over his meditation over altering his element. Depending on what element he is makes his play-style different or something and he plays around with adapting and so on and so forth. So far, I'm going to reject him so you can change his move set so that he doesn't seemingly have access to other moves, as well as give you some time to come up with more moves based on it all.


Ah now I clearly see what you mean. That does make more sense now that I think of it.

Let me change that and add some more "bridging moves" (like with the slash being accessible in all the other elements but in different ways).

Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Dead Cruiser
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@redbaron1234@KaiserElectric

Here's time for me to admit that I don't know the exact definition of "rushdown," I just thought it sounded appropriate for Makoto. So as far as her moveset and its versatility goes, I was under the impression that I was giving her a relatively shallow moveset. She has one utility ability, and absolutely nothing defensive. In fact, three of her moves are literally just punching something. WRT the hyperbole, does it work for you if I just write "Makoto claims" or something before much of it? I don't know how to specifically quantify the actual strength of her attacks without a specific meter to work with. Ideally she would be considered Strong but not too strong.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Lmpkio
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@Lmpkio I did the necessary changes and added some new abilities for Callus. If you have any other ideas for what he can use, by all means let me know.

I also added wood and metal to better represent the Chinese Wu Xing chart, but only as part of the umbrella term with Earth (These elements are also neutral like Earth)
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Savo
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All I can say is that this is the true JJBA part 9 :^)

... with a mix of Skullgirls 2.0, kek... sad they never finished it completely.


@Dead Cruiser ok, back to the way you described things with her. You put her ki levels at about, I dunno, above, above average when comparing the average nomad to her. Along with that, you described her more as a rushdown. With the tools in her kit right now, she comes off more as a shotoclone in that regards to attack, defense, speed, and her kit. You might need to retool her to make her sound more like the rushdown you thought she was... or make her a shotoclone.

Speaking of retooling, back to the two things I mentioned earlier - descriptions and weaknesses. Could you change the description of your fighting style and moves to match her current strength at least? This is to avoid any confusion in the future for the most part. I know I'm reiterating what red covered, but could you at least do that?

Along with that, retool her weakness and give her somethings that fit her rushdown nature, like obvious telegraphed attacks and not a whole lot of ways to protect herself... possibly dropping some attacks like the black hole one possibly, I dunno? If you want to focus on shotoclone, a weakness to list could be having her be balanced in all areas but not excel in any of them. Just a thought on her.

Correct her and set her up once more and I shall review her again, but for now I need to deny her until these problems are addressed.


@Pirouette Mori is a character that doesn't harbor a lot of problems for me. I only really have two issues with her - some portions of her backstory and one of her supers. Description and personality are superb, and the backstory I give a thumbs up to for right now. However, it does involve one of the user created organizations. it was not originally conceived by Kai, red, or I, but rather @wxps350. It is best if you discuss things with him over this and whether or not you have to change her backstory.

Next, your moveset and fighting style. For one, I already see the synergy here and how she functions. She whittles away at opponents slowly and keeps her distance while pissing them off with debuffs. She seldom has any decent attacks and her only one that doesn't require two moves at once is a super.

So good on you, save for Death and Decay. On paper, it sounds pretty neat. In practice, it basically permanently effects a character easily. I have two suggestions for how she could change it.

One is having her sap a nomads ki temporarily. If they are fully drained, they will start to take more damage and have their health decrease until they leave the affected area or until the super comes to an end. With that said, when they get out of the area, they can regen their ki and not take more damage.

Another thought is that maybe it could damage tools and equipment while lightly damaging them rather than temporarily draining their ki and doing the rest I described... with the same effects of gtfo of the zone that she has affected.

Regardless, get that all sorted out because for now, I have to reject her. Interesting pixie chick though.


@wxps350 ok, so, personality, backstory, and descriptions check out. His fighting style is clearly defined and while the descriptions on his attacks are short, they get straight to the point. Weaknesses are clearly defined both in his fighting style and psyche. Above all, I have no problem with him in the slightest. Punch Crusader fists his way into the nomadic fist!

Accepted. Add him on with the rest of your characters.


And last but not least, @DracoLunaris...

The co-gms and I are having a bit of a discussion... so I can't exactly go over your character properly until we straighten some things out. Apologies.
Hidden 6 yrs ago 6 yrs ago Post by A Lowly Wretch
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@Savo - I shall make all the changes needed and re-post his CS to the OOC here. As for explaining Al's healing, hm...

Well, to break it down as it currently stands it is basically a passive effect which can be toggled on at will which heals smaller wounds faster than larger wounds. Assuming we're simplifying the overall health of the body and the state at which it operates into a numerical percentage then his healing as it currently stands can, assuming the max time for each category of injury listed is required, heal his health total from one percent to one hundred percent in a sum of nine minutes and forty seconds. Naturally it costs him ki to maintain this effect, more ki than he passively recovers. With this being the case he cannot heal his body and regain ki at the same time and having either reduced to zero will almost definitely result in his defeat. In addition this power can be used to heal others but for double the cost and half the speed since his mythic ki gets weaker the further it is from him, always starting at half strength the moment it's beyond the limits of his own body.

I do not believe this form of healing is stronger than, say, Malus's living metal regeneration as Malus's healing does not have an upper cap to how much damage he can receive before he straight up dies like Al does. As for speed while ten minutes is a ludicrous speed compared to a normal human's regeneration in an active fight it's quite a long time. I've scarcely seen a fighting game with time limits higher than ten minutes. It plays to his strength which is fatiguing his opponent over a long hard fought match and works into his weakness towards getting his ki burnt down with a steady stream of heavy, unrelenting damage.

_
Don't mistake my explanations for an unwillingness to adapt his healing to better suit you. If you still feel as if his healing doesn't gel with your vision of this world I can offer a different take on his healing ability.

I could, for example, modify his divine healing to work more like Bastion from Overwatch's "Self-Repair" ability, albeit slower. It would heal his wounds (Or the wounds of someone he is physically touching) at a steady rate and require him to take no other action outside of maintaining concentration on the power. On top of still costing him the normal sum of ki required to maintain the power it would force him to look for moments where he can acquire a reprieve and borrow the time needed to heal either his or another's health.

If you have any other suggestions regarding Al's healing or just Al in general I am happy to hear you out. The fault is only mine if something about Al doesn't seem to be the right fit for this rp.

As for @redbaron1234, I eagerly await to hear your input on Al. I will note that I will be posting another edition of his CS here soon so do look out for that when considering what you've seen thus far.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Dead Cruiser
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@Savo As I mentioned a moment ago, I don't know what qualifies as a rushdown or shotoclone as far as moveset goes. I also am unsure of how I can quantify her strength without access to a metric to work from.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by redbaron1234
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(Sorry for the double pings, guys)

@A Lowly Wretch@Valor





Hidden 6 yrs ago 6 yrs ago Post by Roughdragon1
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Okey, mine is up now
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Hidden 6 yrs ago 6 yrs ago Post by Pirouette
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I’ll change Death and Decay tomorrow. The whole gimmick is anti-life so I’m going with the drain ki and then damage individuals. I assume that means weaker entities will just wither? Plants, animals, etc... assuming there isn’t an abundance of ki within them.

Um. It doesn’t have to be the Horizon whatever’s. They are established lore though and it does sound like it would fit their MO? Guess I’ll wait for the guy to let me know if it is permissible .

So that’s it for issues? Made a pretty good first go at it, then.

Oh. If I think of anything ability wise to add in the future... is that permissible? (Upon approval, no doubt)
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by redbaron1234
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@Dead Cruiser Well here's a primer:

Shotoclones are kind of the Marios of fighting games. The classic examples are Ken and Ryu from street fighter. They typically have a fireball like projectile and a few other martial arts strikes. They tend to be a jack of all trades kind.

Rushdowns are characters that workto close the distance between them and their opponents and keep the pressure on their opponent with combos and juggling. They are all offense, all the time. An example of this would be Fox or Yoshi from Smash Brothers.
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Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by BayRat
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@Savo@redbaron1234@KaiserElectric

I apologize for flaking out last year. If its alright with you guys, I'd like to resubmit a revamped version of my old char after I make some changes if you don't mind me joining. Now that I'm back to a normal schedule I feel obligated to be committed to this.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by A Lowly Wretch
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@redbaron1234 - Excellent advice. I'm working on the formatting and moving of the powers right as I write this (Perhaps not EXACTLY as I write this but the idea remains).

Given both your and Savo's advice I'm thinking I should put Al's second iteration up with my proposed alteration to his healing. From what you described the changes that I'll be making to his healing should cover that particular change request quite well, or at least I hope so.

I'll be back shortly with a slightly different Al, his CS hopefully cleaned up to spec.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Squad 404
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Updated Malus a bit with the various suggestions. I removed a few things that were simply annoying to try and balance and clarified some others while nerfing the summoned Dread Lords and Living Metal. Also made his age more vague. Added in EMP hardening for Malus and also buffed his "base stats" due to removing his "Temporarily no weakness" super. Let me know if things need to be changed more.
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Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by redbaron1234
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@Lmpkio
Cal's battle meditation does provide a bitof an interesting mechcanic, lets the character vary the flavor of their attacks. The Backstory is fine, and the attacks are fine. I do wonder how the elements would interact with other elemental ki attacks, but those can easily be hashed out as needed. As it stands it all looks good to me.
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Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by redbaron1234
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@dragonmancer
Hey hey! Nice to see you back. Looks like you're going to have more mythic buddies around :P
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Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Savo
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I'll respond to everything tomorrow... or possibly on Friday. Depends on how tired I am tomorrow, just want to get this easy approval out of the way.

@Lmpkio, took a look over your stuff and it all works; weaknesses are up to date as well with fighting style too. All in all, he is good to go.

And now that he has all three of our approvals, he goes straight into the character tab.
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Hidden 6 yrs ago 6 yrs ago Post by A Lowly Wretch
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@Savo@redbaron1234 - Here's Al, now with the fixes asked for implemented. I changed his healing a bit to hopefully better represent the changes requested of it. The Version 2 tag is temporary, it won't be staying should the sheet be accepted.

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