"I know why the caged bird sings"
Acacia Hawthorne
“Why is my reflection someone I don't know?"There's something fundamentally wrong with herself. Acacia knows that, at least on a subconscious level. Perhaps the worse thing she does, is that she chooses to ignore the fact that she probably needs some serious help, and instead, blames herself for trivial things. Put simply, Acacia Hawthorne is a coward. She can't find the courage to reach out for help, or to reassure herself that she's okay with who she is. So, she hides it all behind a mask, something that she's done for so long that the mask has firmly melded itself to her. Every day is plagued by self doubt, product of a cripplingly low self esteem. She manages to cover it up with her sweet smile, but still. She can't always run away from what she's truly feeling, deep down inside.
But she does anyway. Because she has everything, doesn't she? She has the money, she has the looks, she has the brains, she has the connections... What more could someone want? What else is there to gain?
Her biggest problem is the fact that she doesn't reach out to her friends and family for help. Perhaps it's the result of having parents who couldn't care less about her. Maybe it's because she's expected to do everything by herself. Whatever the case, it's obvious that she has problems she needs to resolve, trust issues to overcome... But she has to realize that she needs to change.
While she doesn't believe the perfect act she puts up, she doesn't see how bad of a position she's in right now.
Jacob Rockwell
"Joy, sorrow, rage, indifference... They're all so insignificant in the big picture. It really makes you wonder if it's worth it."Acacia has spent four years observing Jacob as he struggled with his inner demons. She's seen him hit rock bottom, and she saw how he fought to stay afloat. Throughout their time as classmates in Caelbury, Acacia has often considered extending aid to him, to try to help him with whatever he was going through, but she never did. Sometimes, it's best not to interfere. They've never exactly been good friends, and she would've felt like she was stepping out of line if she said something. She has seen that broken look in his eyes, and now realizes that it's replaced with something much more postive: Determination. His eyes are brimming with it.
He seems like broken glass, hastily put together with a lot of tape. It seems that he should fall apart soon, but somehow, he manages to keep everything together.
What's propelling him forward? Acacia can only wonder.
On friendly terms with each other, Acacia can appreciate his intellect. She hopes that he finds her as someone who he can talk to, especially because she can keep up with his scientific mind. And, while she isn't incredibly open about this, she does play a lot of video games. No doubt there's some overlap in interest here and there, she secretly hopes to play against him sometimes.
Julie Scott
"Hard work, and polishing yourself is no doubt very important. But there's a limit. You can't possibly push yourself so hard all the time, you're going to fizzle out eventually."Acacia sees Julie as a hard worker. Julie tries so hard at everything, whether is be academics, or trying to fit in socially. It's the latter that worries her. Acacia knows first hand that trying to fit in, trying to be liked is often more counterproductive than it is productive. She's such a sweet girl, Acacia thinks that Julie is much more appealing when she let's herself be who she really is. When Julie laughs, it brightens up the room, but when she has that hesitant half-smile on her face, it's rather sad to see. There's just something about her awkwardness that's endearing.
Of course, Acacia could benefit from following her own advice, but that's a different story.
She of course, is aware of how Julie gets to nervous when she's around the Student Council President. Acacia doesn't really consider herself intimidating, so it saddens her a bit when she sees that Julie might feel uncomfortable with her. But still, she can feel that Julie is slowly warming up to her, the times she stutters when they're conversing has decreased quite a bit. All in all, they're not great friends yet, but they're definitely on the right track.
Max Wallenberg
"Books are a portal to another world. You can be anyone you want when you read a book, you can go anywhere you want to go. You can be as brave as the hero, or as cunning as the villain. Whatever goes."Being a rather social person, Acacia has definitely heard of the rumors surrounding this aloof young fellow. But who is she to judge someone else's sexual life? From what she knows of Max, he doesn't seem like a bad person. She quite likes him, in fact. They get along rather well, especially because he makes her crazy proposals happen as the treasurer of the Student Council. That guarantees him at least a B+ in Acacia's book.
They also have rather similar tastes in books, and they can often be seen casually passing each other a book as they walk by each other in the hallway. Acacia always loves the books that he recommends to her, and she always writes little notes on post-its and puts them on the covers when she returns his books. Just little things like "I loved it!" or "The main character is a d-bag, I wanted to smack him". And Acacia loves teasing him with spoilers, threatening to reveal the big twist. But she never truly does reveal anything, f course, She just pretends to.
She knows that he's been trying to produce his own writing, and she's always there to help when needed. Acacia can be a pretty awesome editor when she needs to be... She just wants to be the first to get Max's autograph when he finally publishes his first work.
Wren Sinclair
"In the end, life is just a masquerade ball. The path to success is figuring out what mask to wear."Acacia sees Wren as the little sister she's never had. Despite being the youngest child, Acacia has an older-sister-vibe to her, and that reflects upon her relationship with Wren. Of course, that's not the only reason why they're so close. The two are very similar, and perhaps Acacia is one of the few people who can truly empathize with the young actress. They're living life with the same pressure, and the same insatiable need for greatness.
At least Wren has a clear direction in life. She knows what she loves, and what she wants to do. In that regard, Wren is already in a better place than Acacia.
Although Acacia has a lot of genuine friends, it's obvious that Wren is a lot closer to Acacia than most people. Eliza, Wren, and Acacia have frequent sleepovers on the weekends, staying up late to watch movies and of course, can't forget the girl talks that happen once the lights are out. While they bond over silly things like the latest chick-flicks, ice cream, cute boys, recent Caelbury drama, and all of those girly things, there's an unspoken understanding between the two about how they're not truly alone upon that high pedestal.
Eliza Herring
"Sometimes, life gives you people that are intimidating. Maybe they're not the most likely friend, or they just plain scare you. But one day, you're going to turn around and realize that there's no one else you'd rather have as an ally."When someone is asked to name Acacia's friends, Eliza is always the first name to be mentioned. Being roommates for all four years, being where they are in the social hierarchy, and considering that they're always somewhere in the near vicinity of one another, there's really no question as to why. To some people, it may seem like it's a friendship based on convenience and wealth, but that's simply not true. Growing up in very similar households, there's something identifiable to each other that makes their bond all the more stronger.
If Acacia is being completely honest though, Eliza wasn't someone she immediately thought "I want to be her friend!" There was some kind of burning determination in Eliza's eyes when they first met, that made the rather timid Acacia wary. So she was a bit taken aback when Eliza approached her in the beginning of their freshman year. Despite the initial wariness, Acacia uickly warmed up to Eliza and they've been inseperable every since.
There's no doubt in Acacia's mind that Eliza is the stronger of the duo. While Acacia is the more friendly, outgoing one, Eliza doesn't have the need for the social approval that Acacia relentlessly seeks. To Acacia, that makes Eliza so much more free. She's not bound by other people's opinions, and Acacia is so envious of that fact.
Jack Riley
"Everyone has weaknesses for a reason. To become stronger. To exploit them for your own benefit is a despicable thing to do."People like Jack are the worst kind of people that Acacia will encounter. She's a rather trusting person--in terms of very casual things, not the personal struggles that she fights through. She trusts nobody enough to reveal that--or, if you put it negatively, she's gullible. And Jack no doubt wants to rip away the flawless persona that she has fabricated for herself. After all, why not? The Hawthornes are a powerful family, and Acacia Celeste Hawthorne's name has yet to be tainted by a scandal. And besides, she seems like an easy target: Vulnerable, trusting, with something to hide.
Best of luck to you Jack, because it's not going to be easy.
It's very difficult to decipher what Acacia hides underneath her exterior. After all, she's a perfectionist in every sense of the word. Her entire life has revolved around fixing any visible flaws. Jack is going to have to dig deeply for any dirt on her. Her record is spotless, and she has never stepped a toe out of line.
Acacia will eventually realize what kind of person Jack is, but for now, she has no neative opinion towards him. Perhaps he's not the most charming, due to his harsh attitude, but Acacia cuts everyone some slack. Maybe it's the first day nerves, maybe the high end environment is getting to him. She always gives chances, and hopefully, that won't be her downfall.
Slias Eberhardt
"How can you be so alone, in a room filled with so many people?"It's not often that someone surpasses Acacia in something. and that's not just because she's naturally talented at everything. She also puts in a lot of time and effort into whatever she does, in the most efficient way possible. She improves herself until her skill can guarantee her the top. Until she met Silas, this has more or less worked effectively.
She considered herself musical, and exceptional in her musical talent. After all, she plays a handful of instruments, including what Silas focuses on--the violin. It's not like she considered herself proficient after picking it up once and screeching away, she took lessons, practiced on her own, joined the orchestra, etc, etc. But upon hearing Silas play, it had her reconsidering what her definition of "good" was. Simply put, Acacia can never even begin to accomplish what Silas has already achieved, and for once, she's okay with that.
As a person though, Silas can be forgettable compared to the other dynamic personalities that exist in Caelbury. And that's only because he keeps to himself. Nevertheless, Acacia is more or less intrigued by this distant musician. She has a hard time striking up a conversation with him though, that aloof aura making it difficult to go up to him. And every time they do talk, he seems uninterested.
Luke Clark
"Art is complex and strange. What it means to you, may mean something else to another."A shy boy, eh? Acacia will probably get him to open up soon enough. She always makes a point to go up to a person hanging out alone to go talk to them. By their reaction, she can usually tell if they're just shy, or if they want to be left alone. If it's the latter, Acacia won't be pushy, but if it's the former, Acacia will go out of her way to chat with them every now and then. This will most likely be the case for Luke. She tries to be as approachable as possible, so she's been successful in coaxing people out of their shells. People can start out intimidated by her, but usually she can ease their initial reaction with a sweet smile and a few gentle words.
Acacia isn't as out of reach as everyone seems to think folks, she talks to everyone.
Like most people, Acacia can appreciate art, whether she understands it or not. At the very least, it's visually pleasing to look at. Acacia is good at sketching things and copying other drawings, but that's the only thing she can do. She doesn't really have the artistic ability to create something truly her own, so she's envious of anyone that does. She loves going through people's sketchbooks and looking through what they've created, even if she'll die if someone did the same to her. In her case, it's because she doesn't want anyone to see her failed attempts at drawing, not because she's poured her heart and soul into them.
Geoffrey Lenser
"It's the sad reality of this world that people will fall in 'love' with money and technology that someone has, not the person."Being at the top of the social ladder, both in and out of Caelbury, Acacia is one of those people who seldom see the ugly side of Geoffrey's personality. So to her, Geoffrey seems pleasant enough, even if he's a little bit more opinionated than she likes. Before she got the chance to talk to him, and see how he interacted with other students, her impression of him was fairly positive. He always held open doors for her and such, which is always nice and polite. Seeing how he treats people he considers 'below' him though, makes Acacia really wonder what his true colors really are.
But like she does with everyone, Acacia will wait to make the final judgement until she sees for herself. Rumors and complaints are often exaggerated, and Acacia gives everyone a few chances to prove themselves. But the majority of the feedback she hears about him is "OMG he's got that new phone, it's not even out in stores yet!" which isn't very helpful. But as someone with a keen interest in technology, she does admit that she would love to talk to him about the industry and all of the developing innovations--assuming he knows about the process of creating such luxuries.
Alena Rurik
"True wisdom isn't measured from intellectual ability."Can you say absolutely adorable?
She's probably one of the most innocent people Acacia has ever met, and the most honest. People like Alena are difficult to find in the upper class, due to the 'survival of the fittest' nature in this social class, and it's a fact that Acacia knows very well. It's one of the reasons why she admires Alena so. Even Acacia isn't above stepping on people to achieve her goals. While she definitely does not do this consciously--she would die if she knew that this has happened--such is the nature of the upper class. Whether you mean to or not, you end up walking all over everybody in one way or another.
Acacia sees Alena as a big friendly giant that might squish a bunny because it's trying to pet it. While the simile is obvious exaggerated, Acacia feels that it captures the athlete quite well. Especially when Alena picks Acacia up and hugs her very tightly. Of course, Acacia doesn't mind, she loves hugs!
And she hopes that Alena will ask her for help if she needs it. As a TA for some classes, she's graded some of Alena's work, and it wasn't exactly a desirable grade. Acacia doesn't say anything about it because she doesn't want to embarrass Alena, but Acacia is a pretty good tutor. So keep that in mind, Alena.
Alex Harrowling
"Only people born to wealth will feel it to be a burden."Acacia's first impression of Alex? "How... Awkward...?" She doesn't know if he's just not used to girls, if he's scared of her or uncomfortable or what, but Alex is just so awkward around her. Not that it's a bad thing, but it usually coaxes a slightly awkward smile of her own. Acacia can understand why Alex would want his peace and quiet, especially in a boarding school. It's like you have no time for yourself. Even someone as social as Acacia needs time to recharge and relax by herself with no disturbances.
Despite Alex's initial awkwardness around her, they're on fairly friendly terms. Perhaps not the closest of friendships, but they know enough about each other to text each other on occasion, and hang out at times. It would appear that Acacia's older sister and Alex's older brother know each other quite well due to having the same profession, so that's another topic that they can talk about. Usually, it's more about how they both know the pros and the cons to having an actor as an older sibling though, rather than what movies they're in, or they did this, or that or whatever.
Tomika Marias
"The appreciation of wealth is important, but it's even more crucial to not cling to it."Even Acacia has people she doesn't know that well, and Tomika happens to be one of them. Of course, Acacia goes up to her to talk on occassion, and she has the impression that Tomika is a sweet, if somewhat awkward girl. When Tomika's around her closer friends, Acacia has seen her come more to life, signifying the not particularly close relationship between the two.
Having experienced only one social class in her life time, Acacia really can't even imagine how startling the sudden transition has been for Tomika. After all, the highest class is exclusive for a reason. It's the unfortunate truth that just having money isn't enough to be accepted. In some ways, the only way to get into the highest class is to be born to it, where you learn the subtle mannerisms, the etiquette, the essence of that top 1%. It'll no doubt be a struggle to fit in, but Acacia is optimistic about this. After all, she's a very friendly person who doesn't really think much about social class. Little does she know that she's more bound by it than she thinks.
Aoife Abbot
"Even if the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, can't you still roll the apple away, before it rots in the shade?"The word "avoid" is an overstatement, but still holds some partial truth. Aoife is perhaps one of the few people that Acacia doesn't actively seek out. Why? Because it's obvious that she'd rather be left alone. It's not because of the bad reputation that her father has, Acacia knows that parents don't necessarily define their child. (Kind of ironic, coming from Acacia. She has in fact allowed her parents to dictate her life, and has let her parents define her self worth.) And she'd probably give more effort to talk to Aoife if there wasn't such an aura of distaste around her.
While Aoife doesn't openly flaunt it, it's clear to Acacia that the she doesn't hold a high opinion of her. Despite her best efforts, there will always be people who dislike Acacia, simply for being who she is, and her wealthy status. Aoife just happens to be one of those girls who's not charmed by Acacia's reputation. The only way to change that is to personally convince the person otherwise. While Acacia doesn't do that on purpose, she does have a subconscious motive of
"I'm talking to you because I want you to like me." even if she doesn't realize it. This year, Acacia might try to talk to Aoife, but there's no guarantee. Aoife seems to have set her mind on her opinion of Acacia, and will probably not change it. Must be a stereotype thing.
Connor MacQuarrie
"Breaking the ice is a very useful skill, but one must be aware and tread lightly, before the ice below one's feet shatters as well."You don't see many people like Connor in Caelbury, that's for sure. Perhaps that's the reason why Acacia is so intrigued by him. Everything from his speech, to his mannerisms, the very way he carries himself is so different from what Acacia is used to. Perhaps he wouldn't seem so unique if Acacia had gone through a public school, but she did not, and the slang that he throws around often puzzles her. It's like he's speaking in a different dialect. Being the bright young lady that she is, she can understand what he's saying, but it's like hearing a different accent for the first time. It's so strange.
Still, it's not like his different way of life really bothers Acacia. He's an entertaining person to have around, and when Connor is in the near vicinity, Acacia usually ends up with a smile upon her lips. But recently she's noticed that she doesn't know him too well. He's the type of person that she would lend her phone to, she trusts him enough for that. She would go and sit with him at lunch sometimes, or partner up with in class. But due to their rather casual relationship, Acacia doesn't really know anything below the surface. Acacia isn't a nosy person, and isn't one to dig, but she can't help but wonder sometimes.
Who is Connor, and why is he so.... Whatever he is?
Brenden Aldrin
"To assimilate oneself into another social class comes with it's challenges and hardships, more than the resulting rewards.
Hayden Hawthorne
"How can it be, that the most trustworthy and sweetest person you know, can be the most terrifying at the same time?"The closest Acacia has to a father-figure is her oldest brother. It makes sense once you know Acacia's story. Despite living in the same house, Acacia's actual father was absent from Acacia's life, and she was largely raised by her older siblings, and as it stands, not all of her older siblings were the most kind. And even though Hayden had already chosen his own path by the time Acacia was born, he always made a point to drop by every so often. That's more than her parents have ever done for little Acacia. Hayden was her favorite playmate, and she would run up to him as fast as her little toddler legs could carry her whenever he showed up.
Most people wouldn't want to attend a school where their older brother taught, but to Acacia, it was one of the best things ever. It was one of the only reliable ways she would be able to see her favorite brother on a daily basis, and she couldn't be more thankful for the sanctuary that he provides. He gave her a home away from home, and supplies a secure, protected environment in a cold and merciless world. It's no wonder that Acacia always finds an excuse to not go home during the holidays, she would much rather spend it with Hayden.
Perhaps Hayden is overprotective over her, and people may think that Acacia needs to grow and mature on her own without her brother standing over her. But in truth, Acacia needs him, his guidance and care are what keeps her from falling victim to her fragile psyche.
Alli Kendrick
Flynn Zimmerman
"He's like an icy flame. There's something churning inside, but outwardly he's distant and aloof."Is there anyone as slippery as the mysterious Flynn Zimmerman? Acacia just can't grasp who this person is, she can't get a proper reading of him or anything. He's the very definition of a wallflower, and Acacia gets the feeling that she's seeing less than 10% of what he truly is. Does he even know what he's capable of? What goes on behind that stoic expression? Those are questions that will probably never get answered.
Whenever Acacia gets a chance, she sneaks glances at the Ethics and Philosophy teacher--when she manages to find him at least--not enough to be noticeable, but enough to observe him periodically. The only time she can reliably find him is during class, and by then, she's usually busy musing over all of the rather deep topics that are posed during that class period and she gets too distracted to try to figure him out.
Jaycen Pierce
"The radiance of the sun burns so much..."Perhaps one of the liveliest and brightest people that Acacia has ever met, Jaycen Pierce brings the enthusiasm to gym class, even to the non-athletic students. That's pretty darn impressive, considering the large number of people who dislike physical activity. His energy is contagious, and even on off days, Acacia finds herself perking up a bit in his presence.
His dedication to helping out athletes is impressive. Even though he's not an ice skater, he has taken it upon himself to study up on it a bit to help her improve her technique. The way he absorbs information about sports is simply astounding, and the feedback he has given her has in fact been more productive than some of the coaches she has trained under. And Acacia isn't even a top athlete! While she's good enough to be able to pursue a career if she wishes to, she has chosen not to. Knowing that fact, he still offers her his help.
Saul Kirschenzweig
"People claim that they prefer to be stabbed in the front, and not the back. I wonder how true that is?"Being who she is, Acacia Hawthorne has received fake compliments, meaningless flattery, and false feedback. And so, Acacia appreciates Saul's direct, harsh critique. She does... She really truly does. It's
almost brought her to tears a few times though. Almost. Acacia Hawthorne doesn't cry in front of anyone. Still, as a perfectionist, as someone who is obsessed with having no flaws, it's extremely difficult to deal with having every single little thing you did wrong pointed out in front of the entire class. It's not the gentle nudge that Acacia has grown up with and preferred, but it's something.
Out of all of the teachers, Saul is the one who Acacia is a little bit intimidated by. Its not just the non-sugarcoated feedback either. There's just a certain toughness about him, the thousand year old stare of a person who had seen and done far too much. Maybe it's because of his time in the Marines, or something else. But the steeliness of the drama teacher tends to make Acacia shrink back in his presence.
Liam Matthews
"What's the point if you don't have a reason to live?"Empty. Broken. Those are the words that come to Acacia's mind whenever she sees her psychology teacher. Whether he's aware of it or not, his eyes are sunken and exhausted, devoid of life. His steps are heavy as he moves around. And frankly, Acacia half expects a rain cloud to follow him everywhere. He's a great teacher no doubt, but it seems that he could benefit from him own lessons. Isn't there a unit in psych about depression?
It's so sad because Acacia likes Liam. She thinks he's a great person, but he's not handling himself right at all. Acacia has met his kids--sweet children by the way--and she couldn't help but feel pity for them. If she were to compare them to some fictional characters, his kids would be Katniss and Prim before the 74th Hunger Games, and Liam would be the mother, unable to cope with the loss of a loved one, and neglecting everything else in the process.
"Can you see below the surface?"
