Well, I felt good about my start. Then, I read all of yours. Shit.
*adds "Write more good" to to-do list*
Can I get a copy of that to-do list?
Lord Wraith
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Thunderbringer
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- Old Guild Username: Lord Wraith
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Bio
Reluctantly retired roleplayer.
Except when I'm not.
Why are you here when you should be writing posts?
You can edit a bad draft, but you cannot edit a blank page.
Except when I'm not.
Why are you here when you should be writing posts?
You can edit a bad draft, but you cannot edit a blank page.
Most Recent Posts
Can I get a copy of that to-do list?
<Snipped quote by Hillan>
This is where we blacklist Hillan from the RP, right?
And to think he was on track to usurp Sep's MVP crown.
"When the winter winds blow and the Yule fires glow,
Listen to the whispers from the trees of pine.
The silence of the forest knows, that when the winter winds blow
It is best to stay locked inside.”
Listen to the whispers from the trees of pine.
The silence of the forest knows, that when the winter winds blow
It is best to stay locked inside.”
Location Osage County - Oklahoma
Issue #2.01: A Dire Situation
The cold winds of mid-December washed over the prairies of Oklahoma as the passive giants lazily lumbered across the grassy plains. Despite the falling night, the bison still remained, grazing as the night’s chilly air washed over them, sending a shiver down their spines.
A fresh dusting of snow crunched under the hooves of the herd as their snouts dug through the frosty, white, powder before ripping at the dying grass hidden beneath. The waxing moon overhead cast a long, eerie shadow over the prairie as several pronghorns ran by the herd of bison, their calls echoing over the low lying plains as they raced towards the fading horizon.
As the pronghorns disappeared over the horizon, an eerie silence fell over the plain before being broken by another howling gust of wind. Raising its head into the wind, the herds’ bull flared his nostrils as he let out a loud low, the other bison echoing the noise as they began to move.
But it was too late as a silhouette appeared on the horizon, the light of the moon casting a long shadow as a piercing cry caused the herd to panic. The ground shook under their thundering hooves as the creature gave chase, its own pack flanking the alpha as they quickly close the gap. Howls drowned out the wind as the beasts jumped onto the hindquarters of the bison, dragging bull, cow, and calf alike to the snow-covered ground. White became red as the predators bit and tore, ripping flesh from broken bones.
A gunshot rang out, breaking the feeding frenzy as the creatures’ attention was torn from the herd towards the truck that had stopped several yards away. Another shot echoed across the open fields as the creatures turned towards the farmer currently pointing the rifle towards them. Realizing the sheer size of the snarling beasts, the man dropped his rifle in fright as the headlights of his truck reflected off of the hungry, yellow eyes.
Rearing back its head, the alpha predator howled towards the waxing moon only to suddenly have its cries silenced as a brave bull retaliated for the death of its mate and calf. The bison’s horns plunging into the beasts’ neck as the creature was plowed through the snow, its ribs trampled upon and neck broken, taking the life from its lungs.
Scrambling for his dropped gun, the farmer took ahold of the weapon, bracing it against the door of his vehicle as he fired again. The rest of the savage beasts suddenly scattered having watched their strongest killed as the value for their own survival overrode their hunger. Waiting for the scene to clear, the farmer walked over to the bloody carnage, stepping over the corpses of bison, holding his gun tightly as he jaw fell open at hos much of the herd had been slaughtered.
A lowing caught his attention as he stumbled across a calf, its hind legs nearly ripped from its body as it struggled to move. Raising the gun, the farmer put the bison out of its misery before his eyes shifted to the lone dead predator. He looked down at the dead creature, horror filling his face as he realized what he was staring at.
The what remained of the creature’s corpse resembled that of a wolf.
A wolf, the size of a bison.
A fresh dusting of snow crunched under the hooves of the herd as their snouts dug through the frosty, white, powder before ripping at the dying grass hidden beneath. The waxing moon overhead cast a long, eerie shadow over the prairie as several pronghorns ran by the herd of bison, their calls echoing over the low lying plains as they raced towards the fading horizon.
As the pronghorns disappeared over the horizon, an eerie silence fell over the plain before being broken by another howling gust of wind. Raising its head into the wind, the herds’ bull flared his nostrils as he let out a loud low, the other bison echoing the noise as they began to move.
But it was too late as a silhouette appeared on the horizon, the light of the moon casting a long shadow as a piercing cry caused the herd to panic. The ground shook under their thundering hooves as the creature gave chase, its own pack flanking the alpha as they quickly close the gap. Howls drowned out the wind as the beasts jumped onto the hindquarters of the bison, dragging bull, cow, and calf alike to the snow-covered ground. White became red as the predators bit and tore, ripping flesh from broken bones.
A gunshot rang out, breaking the feeding frenzy as the creatures’ attention was torn from the herd towards the truck that had stopped several yards away. Another shot echoed across the open fields as the creatures turned towards the farmer currently pointing the rifle towards them. Realizing the sheer size of the snarling beasts, the man dropped his rifle in fright as the headlights of his truck reflected off of the hungry, yellow eyes.
Rearing back its head, the alpha predator howled towards the waxing moon only to suddenly have its cries silenced as a brave bull retaliated for the death of its mate and calf. The bison’s horns plunging into the beasts’ neck as the creature was plowed through the snow, its ribs trampled upon and neck broken, taking the life from its lungs.
Scrambling for his dropped gun, the farmer took ahold of the weapon, bracing it against the door of his vehicle as he fired again. The rest of the savage beasts suddenly scattered having watched their strongest killed as the value for their own survival overrode their hunger. Waiting for the scene to clear, the farmer walked over to the bloody carnage, stepping over the corpses of bison, holding his gun tightly as he jaw fell open at hos much of the herd had been slaughtered.
A lowing caught his attention as he stumbled across a calf, its hind legs nearly ripped from its body as it struggled to move. Raising the gun, the farmer put the bison out of its misery before his eyes shifted to the lone dead predator. He looked down at the dead creature, horror filling his face as he realized what he was staring at.
The what remained of the creature’s corpse resembled that of a wolf.
A wolf, the size of a bison.
Location The Royal City - Asgard
Scorching winds washed over the debris-littered wreckage of the once golden city as two figures slowly moved through its remains. Lava flowed freely from the opened mountains, erasing the shimmering waters that had once surrounded the formerly magnificent city. Molten rock moved under the crumbling arches that had held the city’s bridges, bridges that had stretched in each cardinal direction carrying goods to and from the capital.
The air felt suffocating as Thor pulled the edge of his cloak over his face, shielding himself from the continually falling ash before continuing to walk forward. Beside him, Heimdall matched his pace, hand on the sword at his hip as his keen eyes scanned the horizon, looking far beyond the peaks of Asgard’s once snow-capped mountains that now only rained fire and destruction on the Asgardians’ former realm.
“This is it then?” Thor asked, breaking the silence between the pair as they continued to walk “This is all that is left of Asgard?”
“For now,” Heimdall responded. “Less and less remains with each passing day.”
Walking through what was once the hallways of his home, the ceiling above Thor had given way, revealing the fiery skies that had covered the palace’s interior in ash and soot. From the shadows, glowing eyes watched the two Asgardians as the goblin-like sons of Múspell slinked back into the darkness, fearing the two Asgardians that now walked the halls of the palace once again.
The corridor widened into a large round room, in the center sat the crumbling throne of Asgard, high above a towering ash-covered staircase.
“What are we looking for exactly?” Thor asked as Heimdall steadied the hand on his sword, his eyes drawn towards the throne as the pair continued to move forward.
“Anything that could aid you in finding Loki.” Heimdall answered as he studied the room, his eyes moving from the throne towards what was left of the cathedral-like ceiling above, adorned with the faded images of Asgard’s history.
“Why would Loki come here?” Thor asked steadying himself as the castle suddenly shook, the shifting tectonic plates beneath its foundation moving as Asgard slowly continued to destroy itself under the curse of the Ragnarok Cycle. Stone and plastered dropped from the ceiling, dust and ash rising from the floor as Heimdall shook his head.
“Loki may have held disdain for you and your father, but he wanted to rule Asgard, more than anything else in the realm.” Heimdall answered. “It is possible he returned here hoping that by breaking the cycle, Asgard still remained.”
“I can assure you, Asgardian,” A booming voice answered, the source coming from above the pair, prompting both Thor and Heimdall to turn towards the source, looking upwards as the menacing tone continued to speak. “The Son of Laufey never returned to watch Asgard burn at the hand of the Eternal Flame, but how do I wish he had.”
Giant fingers reached between the cracks of the ceiling, the heat of their flames basking the room below in unbearable heat as Heimdall drew his blade. Lighting crackled along Thor’s arms as he tossed open his cloak, readying himself for a fight as the hands pried the roof of the palace open. A skull-like face peered down at the two Asgardians, its visage cloaked in flame, a broad, horned crown sat upon its brow as a dry rushing of air escaped its orifices, emulating laughter.
Slabs of stone plummeted to the floor of the throne room as the giant continued to pull the roof open as he laughed at the two Asgardians as they scrambled to avoid the falling debris.
“The Prince and the Gatekeeper, come to die at the hands of Surtur!”
“I have to say,” Thor retorted, “That wasn’t exactly my plan!”
“Agreed, m’Lord.” Heimdall replied as he sliced through a large piece of debris. Either side falling harmlessly away from the pair. Turning his face upwards, the dark-skinned Asgardian addressed the giant. “You disrespect the King of Asgard, that is an offense punishable by death!”
Suddenly music began to echo through what was left of the throne room as both Heimdall and Surtur paused, looking towards Thor as the latter’s hand scrambled to his belt only to hold up a ringing cell phone. Sliding his thumb across the screen to answer it, Heimdall shot Thor an exasperated look as Surtur suddenly resumed his attack.
Firing a blast of lightning from his hand, Thor rolled into the cover as Heimdall ran towards the wall, taking a hold of a crumbled pillar before launching himself out of the throne room and through the air towards Surtur.
“Now’s not a really good time-” Blake answered as he held the phone to his air, dodging another piece of debris as the lightning emerged from the clouds of ash hanging low on Asgard’s red sky.
“Doctor Donaldson, glad I caught y’all.” Sheriff Lamb’s voice came through the speaker as Thor pressed the phone to his shoulder, holding it with his cheek as he used both hands to direct a blast of lightning against Surtur.
“Look, I need your help again, when could y’all meet me at the intersection of Concession 83 and County Road 62.” The Sheriff asked as Blake suddenly paused.
“How are we talking right now?” He muttered as the Sheriff laughed.
“Modern technology is a wonderful thing ain’t it? The county’s towers were upgraded just last month so you’re probably not used to the connection being so clear.”
“You could say it’s coming as something of a surprise.” Blake answered as he looked at his surroundings shaking his head.
“So when can y’all meet me? Sooner would be better than later.” The Sheriff asked again as Heimdall suddenly landed in front of Thor sliding backward before he caught himself.
“We need to go now, my Liege.”
“How about in an hour?” Blake answered, “Look, it’s really not a good time right now, I’ve got to go!”
“An hour it is then, bye Doc-” The Sheriff replied as Thor locked the phone, tucking it back into his belt. A flaming sword sliced through the walls of the palace as Surtur gripped the blade tightly, swinging as Heimdall and Thor barely escaped its wrath.
“Heimdall!” Thor roared.
“I know!” Heimdall replied as he slammed Hofund into the ground. “Open the Bifrost!” He yelled as Thor ran towards the Gatekeeper, jumping forwards as the pillar of light collided with the ground, consuming the pair of Asgardians as they were transported to safety.
The air felt suffocating as Thor pulled the edge of his cloak over his face, shielding himself from the continually falling ash before continuing to walk forward. Beside him, Heimdall matched his pace, hand on the sword at his hip as his keen eyes scanned the horizon, looking far beyond the peaks of Asgard’s once snow-capped mountains that now only rained fire and destruction on the Asgardians’ former realm.
“This is it then?” Thor asked, breaking the silence between the pair as they continued to walk “This is all that is left of Asgard?”
“For now,” Heimdall responded. “Less and less remains with each passing day.”
Walking through what was once the hallways of his home, the ceiling above Thor had given way, revealing the fiery skies that had covered the palace’s interior in ash and soot. From the shadows, glowing eyes watched the two Asgardians as the goblin-like sons of Múspell slinked back into the darkness, fearing the two Asgardians that now walked the halls of the palace once again.
The corridor widened into a large round room, in the center sat the crumbling throne of Asgard, high above a towering ash-covered staircase.
“What are we looking for exactly?” Thor asked as Heimdall steadied the hand on his sword, his eyes drawn towards the throne as the pair continued to move forward.
“Anything that could aid you in finding Loki.” Heimdall answered as he studied the room, his eyes moving from the throne towards what was left of the cathedral-like ceiling above, adorned with the faded images of Asgard’s history.
“Why would Loki come here?” Thor asked steadying himself as the castle suddenly shook, the shifting tectonic plates beneath its foundation moving as Asgard slowly continued to destroy itself under the curse of the Ragnarok Cycle. Stone and plastered dropped from the ceiling, dust and ash rising from the floor as Heimdall shook his head.
“Loki may have held disdain for you and your father, but he wanted to rule Asgard, more than anything else in the realm.” Heimdall answered. “It is possible he returned here hoping that by breaking the cycle, Asgard still remained.”
“I can assure you, Asgardian,” A booming voice answered, the source coming from above the pair, prompting both Thor and Heimdall to turn towards the source, looking upwards as the menacing tone continued to speak. “The Son of Laufey never returned to watch Asgard burn at the hand of the Eternal Flame, but how do I wish he had.”
Giant fingers reached between the cracks of the ceiling, the heat of their flames basking the room below in unbearable heat as Heimdall drew his blade. Lighting crackled along Thor’s arms as he tossed open his cloak, readying himself for a fight as the hands pried the roof of the palace open. A skull-like face peered down at the two Asgardians, its visage cloaked in flame, a broad, horned crown sat upon its brow as a dry rushing of air escaped its orifices, emulating laughter.
Slabs of stone plummeted to the floor of the throne room as the giant continued to pull the roof open as he laughed at the two Asgardians as they scrambled to avoid the falling debris.
“The Prince and the Gatekeeper, come to die at the hands of Surtur!”
“I have to say,” Thor retorted, “That wasn’t exactly my plan!”
“Agreed, m’Lord.” Heimdall replied as he sliced through a large piece of debris. Either side falling harmlessly away from the pair. Turning his face upwards, the dark-skinned Asgardian addressed the giant. “You disrespect the King of Asgard, that is an offense punishable by death!”
Suddenly music began to echo through what was left of the throne room as both Heimdall and Surtur paused, looking towards Thor as the latter’s hand scrambled to his belt only to hold up a ringing cell phone. Sliding his thumb across the screen to answer it, Heimdall shot Thor an exasperated look as Surtur suddenly resumed his attack.
Firing a blast of lightning from his hand, Thor rolled into the cover as Heimdall ran towards the wall, taking a hold of a crumbled pillar before launching himself out of the throne room and through the air towards Surtur.
“Now’s not a really good time-” Blake answered as he held the phone to his air, dodging another piece of debris as the lightning emerged from the clouds of ash hanging low on Asgard’s red sky.
“Doctor Donaldson, glad I caught y’all.” Sheriff Lamb’s voice came through the speaker as Thor pressed the phone to his shoulder, holding it with his cheek as he used both hands to direct a blast of lightning against Surtur.
“Look, I need your help again, when could y’all meet me at the intersection of Concession 83 and County Road 62.” The Sheriff asked as Blake suddenly paused.
“How are we talking right now?” He muttered as the Sheriff laughed.
“Modern technology is a wonderful thing ain’t it? The county’s towers were upgraded just last month so you’re probably not used to the connection being so clear.”
“You could say it’s coming as something of a surprise.” Blake answered as he looked at his surroundings shaking his head.
“So when can y’all meet me? Sooner would be better than later.” The Sheriff asked again as Heimdall suddenly landed in front of Thor sliding backward before he caught himself.
“We need to go now, my Liege.”
“How about in an hour?” Blake answered, “Look, it’s really not a good time right now, I’ve got to go!”
“An hour it is then, bye Doc-” The Sheriff replied as Thor locked the phone, tucking it back into his belt. A flaming sword sliced through the walls of the palace as Surtur gripped the blade tightly, swinging as Heimdall and Thor barely escaped its wrath.
“Heimdall!” Thor roared.
“I know!” Heimdall replied as he slammed Hofund into the ground. “Open the Bifrost!” He yelled as Thor ran towards the Gatekeeper, jumping forwards as the pillar of light collided with the ground, consuming the pair of Asgardians as they were transported to safety.
Location Osage County - Oklahoma
Stepping over the old wooden fence, Dr. Blake Donaldson walked through the tall grass and fresh snow towards Sheriff as he stood waiting atop a small mound of dirt, overlooking the rest of the field. The smell of death hung in the air as Blake spotted the bloody carnage over ten yards away. Pausing beside the Sheriff, Blake pulled his aviators off as he massaged the bridge of his nose before addressing Lamb.
"I thought I told you to call Animal Control next time."1 Blake said as he looked towards Lamb.
“They’re all dead this time,” The Sheriff replied with a smirk. “I don’t need any giant snake controlled, I just need to find out what I’m looking at.” He added as Blake shook his head. Jutting his chin towards Blake’s shoulder, the Sheriff spoke again.
“And who is this fella y’all brought along with you today?” He asked pointing to Heimdall as the other Asgardian extended a hand to meet the Sheriff’s.
“I am Hei-”
“Henry,” Blake interrupted as Heimdall paused looking towards the Son of Odin as the Sheriff continued to smile. “He’s my new Veterinary Technician, Henry, Henry-”
“Henry Jones.” Heimdall added with a smile.
“Yes, Henry Jones Junior.” Blake continued with a forced smile as he looked from Heimdall to the Sheriff who was heartily shaking Heimdall’s hand.
“Well uh alright then, it’s a pleasure to meet y’all, Henry Jones Junior. Hopefully, you can help the good doctor here get to the bottom of what we’re looking at.”
“Why don’t you show us exactly why you wanted us here, Sheriff,” Blake stated, breaking the awkwardness as the trio began to walk through the shallow snow towards the carcasses below. Coming to a stop a few feet from the deceased bison, the sheriff pointed towards a mass of black fur as Blake and Heimdall walked towards it.
The carcass laid on the ground, teeth still bared as Blake knelt towards it, examing the large wolf in front of him. Easily over six feet from hunch to paw, the beast was large, far larger than any known species of wolf that Blake had heard of. It would have been forgivable to mistake it for a bear had the torso not been so distinctly canine.
“So what do you make of it, Doctor?”
“It’s a very large wolf.” Blake answered as he stood, dusting snow from the knee of his jeans as he did so. “And judging by the paw prints, it’s not the only one.”
“Are you saying we have a pack of grizzley sized wolves running around Marville?” The Sheriff asked as Blake nodded slowly.
“It would seem that way.”
“I need to call this in.” The Sheriff stated, turning away from the pair, “Excuse me a second fellas.”
“That is not of Midgard.” Heimdall stated the second the Sheriff was out of earshot. “That is a Dire Wolf.”
“Agreed,” Blake replied raising a hand to head as he motioned to the upper portion of his skull. “I remember them, but not much. A lot of fogginess still up here, I had thought it was gone.”
“They are of Vanaheim,” Heimdall responded. “How they would have arrived on Midgard is beyond me.”
“Then perhaps we should pay the Vanir a visit.”
"I thought I told you to call Animal Control next time."1 Blake said as he looked towards Lamb.
“They’re all dead this time,” The Sheriff replied with a smirk. “I don’t need any giant snake controlled, I just need to find out what I’m looking at.” He added as Blake shook his head. Jutting his chin towards Blake’s shoulder, the Sheriff spoke again.
“And who is this fella y’all brought along with you today?” He asked pointing to Heimdall as the other Asgardian extended a hand to meet the Sheriff’s.
“I am Hei-”
“Henry,” Blake interrupted as Heimdall paused looking towards the Son of Odin as the Sheriff continued to smile. “He’s my new Veterinary Technician, Henry, Henry-”
“Henry Jones.” Heimdall added with a smile.
“Yes, Henry Jones Junior.” Blake continued with a forced smile as he looked from Heimdall to the Sheriff who was heartily shaking Heimdall’s hand.
“Well uh alright then, it’s a pleasure to meet y’all, Henry Jones Junior. Hopefully, you can help the good doctor here get to the bottom of what we’re looking at.”
“Why don’t you show us exactly why you wanted us here, Sheriff,” Blake stated, breaking the awkwardness as the trio began to walk through the shallow snow towards the carcasses below. Coming to a stop a few feet from the deceased bison, the sheriff pointed towards a mass of black fur as Blake and Heimdall walked towards it.
The carcass laid on the ground, teeth still bared as Blake knelt towards it, examing the large wolf in front of him. Easily over six feet from hunch to paw, the beast was large, far larger than any known species of wolf that Blake had heard of. It would have been forgivable to mistake it for a bear had the torso not been so distinctly canine.
“So what do you make of it, Doctor?”
“It’s a very large wolf.” Blake answered as he stood, dusting snow from the knee of his jeans as he did so. “And judging by the paw prints, it’s not the only one.”
“Are you saying we have a pack of grizzley sized wolves running around Marville?” The Sheriff asked as Blake nodded slowly.
“It would seem that way.”
“I need to call this in.” The Sheriff stated, turning away from the pair, “Excuse me a second fellas.”
“That is not of Midgard.” Heimdall stated the second the Sheriff was out of earshot. “That is a Dire Wolf.”
“Agreed,” Blake replied raising a hand to head as he motioned to the upper portion of his skull. “I remember them, but not much. A lot of fogginess still up here, I had thought it was gone.”
“They are of Vanaheim,” Heimdall responded. “How they would have arrived on Midgard is beyond me.”
“Then perhaps we should pay the Vanir a visit.”
1 - Forgotten the last time Sheriff Lamb called Blake for a favour? Check it out HERE
I'm interested, if you still have room. Trying to put a CS together now.
For sure, post it here when you're done then Roman and I will review and get back to you.
Alright cool and I haven't forgotten about your commentary so I will make sure you get that.
Also all accepted players can move their sheets into the character bin.
Also all accepted players can move their sheets into the character bin.
@BoyMom69035, Ivy is accepted.
@Aeolian, Benjamin is accepted.
@Prisk, @Odin, @Hillan, @Lionhearted and the aforementioned, the relationship sheet template has been updated for ease of use.
@Aeolian, Benjamin is accepted.
@Prisk, @Odin, @Hillan, @Lionhearted and the aforementioned, the relationship sheet template has been updated for ease of use.
@Lord Wraith I was hoping for some commentary on what you liked and what you didn't like as much, but an acceptance is an acceptance and I'll take it. Before I move it into the character bin (that's what you want, yes?) I would like to add that the name is Jiao-long, to avoid any long term naming issues before we even start.
Apologies, I don't generally make those mistakes. As for commentary I can get you some tomorrow when I have a bit less Jack Daniels in my system.
@Lord Wraith@Roman
The relationship sheet is something that we should fill out beforehand? I saw the the update/announcement, but I assume that's something that us 'accepted' people can work on now?
If you are an eager beaver you can definitely start it. I was going to update the formatting to make it a bit easier for everyone but that won't happen until tomorrow.
P.S This post brought to you by the magic of predictive texting!
@Lord Wraith ahh, is it too late for new applications?
I'll still consider new apps.
Small change of plans...While I’d really love to be a part of this amazing rp, I’m a bit busy at the moment, and wouldn’t be able to participate actively. I might just follow it for the writing though :)
Okay well pleased that you want to follow along either way. Maybe an opportunity will show up down the road where it works out for you to jump in.
Alright, got some verdicts!
The following characters have been ACCEPTED:
◼ Weston, Marcus as portrayed by @Hillan
◼ Wenrong, Jiao-long as portrayed by @Odin
◼ Brooks, Felix as portrayed by @Lionhearted
◼ Whäner, Esther as portrayed by @Prisk
The following characters will be considered after AMENDMENTS:
Lastly the following characters are declined, Roman and I both appeciate your interest and the time you took to create character sheets but at this time we don't feel like the characters are a good fit.
◼ Chan, Mei as portrayed by @Bee
◼ Harmon, Jocelyn as portrayed by @Almalthia
Thank you to everyone for their interest and I look forward to getting this RP going.
The following characters have been ACCEPTED:
◼ Weston, Marcus as portrayed by @Hillan
◼ Wenrong, Jiao-long as portrayed by @Odin
◼ Brooks, Felix as portrayed by @Lionhearted
◼ Whäner, Esther as portrayed by @Prisk
The following characters will be considered after AMENDMENTS:
◼ Harper, Ivy as portrayed by @BoyMom69035
The only issue preventing acceptance at this point is that we find the powers are almost a little on the weak side. We have concerns about Ivy being able to heal people by taking their injuries without any method to protect or heal herself. We'd like to see something added to her ability to bolster her a little bit.
◼ Hope, Benjamin as portrayed by @Aeolian
The sheet is solid but we have some concerns about the abilities and how the drawbacks feel very limited. If we're both understanding the way the powers have been described, it seems like it could be simplified to intangibility. The other thing that sticks out is that the largest drawbacks to using his power don't happen until after he finishes using it, so we'd like to see the limitations and weaknesses reworked as well.
◼ Estrella, Genessy as portrayed by @Ejected
There's two issues we found when reviewing this sheet, our primary concern however is the powers. Genessy seems quite overpowered and although strain of creating clones is mentioned, we're not exactly sure how many clones she can create before feeling that strain. The entire process is a little on the vague side and Roman and I both feel as though two to three clones should be her max production rate especially at this point. Additionally, neither of us like how the Hive Mind shifts when the 'Host' body dies as it makes her feel somewhat invincible.
The second issue is that her personality feels contradictive. On one hand, she's a social butterfly but on the other hand, she's a introvert and stand offish. It just feels like two conflicting personalities, which could work really well if her Hyperhuman ability was to create one duplicate thus creating a dual personality but in this case I don't know if it works.
The only issue preventing acceptance at this point is that we find the powers are almost a little on the weak side. We have concerns about Ivy being able to heal people by taking their injuries without any method to protect or heal herself. We'd like to see something added to her ability to bolster her a little bit.
◼ Hope, Benjamin as portrayed by @Aeolian
The sheet is solid but we have some concerns about the abilities and how the drawbacks feel very limited. If we're both understanding the way the powers have been described, it seems like it could be simplified to intangibility. The other thing that sticks out is that the largest drawbacks to using his power don't happen until after he finishes using it, so we'd like to see the limitations and weaknesses reworked as well.
◼ Estrella, Genessy as portrayed by @Ejected
There's two issues we found when reviewing this sheet, our primary concern however is the powers. Genessy seems quite overpowered and although strain of creating clones is mentioned, we're not exactly sure how many clones she can create before feeling that strain. The entire process is a little on the vague side and Roman and I both feel as though two to three clones should be her max production rate especially at this point. Additionally, neither of us like how the Hive Mind shifts when the 'Host' body dies as it makes her feel somewhat invincible.
The second issue is that her personality feels contradictive. On one hand, she's a social butterfly but on the other hand, she's a introvert and stand offish. It just feels like two conflicting personalities, which could work really well if her Hyperhuman ability was to create one duplicate thus creating a dual personality but in this case I don't know if it works.
Lastly the following characters are declined, Roman and I both appeciate your interest and the time you took to create character sheets but at this time we don't feel like the characters are a good fit.
◼ Chan, Mei as portrayed by @Bee
◼ Harmon, Jocelyn as portrayed by @Almalthia
Thank you to everyone for their interest and I look forward to getting this RP going.
Alright, for those curious, I have finished my character sheet.
Roman and I have begun character reviews and will get back to you all soon.
Roman and I have begun character reviews and will get back to you all soon.
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