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1 yr ago
Current A Perpetual Motion Engine of Anxiety and Self-Loathing

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So there I am, in Sri Lanka, formerly Ceylon, at about 3 o'clock in the morning, looking for one thousand brown M&Ms to fill a brandy glass, or Ozzy wouldn't go on stage that night. So, Jeff Beck pops his head 'round the door, and mentions there's a little sweets shop on the edge of town. So - we go. And - it's closed. So there's me, and Keith Moon, and David Crosby, breaking into that little sweets shop, eh. Well, instead of a guard dog, they've got this bloody great big Bengal tiger. I managed to take out the tiger with a can of mace, but the shopowner and his son... that's a different story altogether. I had to beat them to death with their own shoes. Nasty business, really. But, sure enough, I got the M&Ms, and Ozzy went on stage and did a great show.

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H O M E W O O D S U I T E S B Y H I L T O N N Y / M I D T O W N

Present Day | Manhattan, New York

Ted sat at his small hotel table setup with his Blue Beetle gloves and cowl on and no shirt, his tongue slightly protruding from the corner of his mouth as he concentrated on soldering the last of the circuitry to what would become his new B.B. gun. His gut was also slightly protruding and his lap was covered with crumbs. He stopped for a break to take a slice of toast and to add more crumbs. He reached over and brought the Hotel room phone closer.

Pulling his own phone out he video chat dialled a number. In a few seconds it auto-answered, revealing a dark room and a large ominous shape. Resting his phone where he could watch the video he dialled a number into the Hotel room phone and waited. In a few seconds a bright blue light appeared on the video chat screen, before blinking a series of times. The light revealed the shape of the Bug in it’s hangar. He hit some buttons on his glove remote, the lights flickered again a darker blue and a single yellow flash. He hung up the Hotel room phone, satisfied that he had logged the Bug back in to his glove’s remote. Ted ran diagnostics and checked for the telltale change to the video chat screen’s lighting. He smiled and returned to his breakfast.

He grabbed the remote and flicked the TV on behind him for background noise. Started on the now cold coffee, and picked up what would be the B.B. gun’s circuit board to inspect the quality of his work. It was a neat job. Sure he’d have to mould a new casing for it soon and pick up components for the sonics settings, as well as to complete the taser rigging, but there would always be time. Given how long he’d worked on the first, this one was coming along very well. There’s something to be said about learning from experience.

He toggled through the view settings on his cowl with his index finger until the results of the diagnostic scan started to scroll in front of his vision. With another selection he pushed it over to just the right lens. Ted rubbed his left lens with his bare wrist and then furrowed his brow. The scorch marks were still there from when Abner Jenkins had nearly flash fried his face. Ted got up and walked to the bathroom to try and clean the lens as best he could with basic soaps and water, when he heard it...

"The time of Men has come to an end..." A voice distorted to be absurdly baritone uttered.

Ted raised an eyebrow. He thought he left the TV on to catch the morning news. He poked his head around the bathroom door, the left lens of his cowl comically caked in soap and suds.

On the screen was a man in heavy metal armour, with a heavy looking bladed helmet.



“How do you even put a thing like that on? I mean it looks like it’d hurt your neck anyway, but... Oh he’s wearing gloves! Well that makes sense. You wouldn't put a helmet like that on without gloves…”

"You sit atop your ivory towers and in your arrogance believe yourselves to be the superior people. You think your government, your armies, your heroes can keep you safe- that they will protect you from people like me. You're all fools. I am called Stryfe, and we are the Metahuman Supremacy Front. We will show America- and humanity- humility. We will tear down your palaces, put to the pyre your precious law and order. We will show you how truly vulnerable your nation really is. Safety is an illusion."

Stryfe uncrossed his arms and approached the camera until his masked face dominated the entire screen.

"This is your reckoning."

“Where is this anyw-- oh!”

Just as soon as Ted asked the question the figure was gone, replaced by the view of Central Park. A workman began to tap several buttons on a remote he held, and a sculpted art-piece reacted. The polished sides of what was a roughly 6 ft tall obelisk sprang open and fell away into the grass, revealing what lay inside.

“Oh… Oh no.” Ted quickly confirmed that diagnostics were complete and the Bug was clear for use, he used his wrist controls to summon it. Less than 8 minutes and counting.

A black mass exploded out of the tower like a swarm of innumerable locust. They swept across Central Park with terrifying speed. Everyone in view was in a panic, sprinting away in an attempt to escape, only to disappear into the swarm as it passed by them. For several, chaotic moments nothing could be made out through the screeching swarm, the entire screen obscured by their presence. It wasn't until they'd moved on that the bodies came back into view.

Ted rushed over to the sliding door to his balcony and looked out. He checked all down West 37th and there was no sign of anything. But then he heard it, a murmuring wave of human screams slowly getting louder and more high pitched, like a wave of terror. He saw people trying to run from far off down 7th Avenue, a few seconds later they were swept down upon by the black wave. A few more seconds passed and he saw the same people trying to flee down 8th Avenue, before the black tide descended upon them even faster this time. Ted turned his head just to see the same sight once more on 9th. A ball was forming in Ted’s throat and he went back inside and slid the balcony door closed. He grabbed the bag with the rest of his Blue Beetle gear and started to put the rest of the suit on, whilst taking what he could from the TV footage.

There wasn't a scratch on any of victims. Every single person was on the ground, in some way, but there appeared to be no blood or gore, and before long they started moving again. But that was even worse. The first one broke the silence with a blood curdling, furious scream. A man, perhaps in his late twenties, sprinted across the grass in an awkward, stumbling gait, running straight for the nearest person to him. He threw his hands at her like they were clubs, bashing away at her skull and face with an animalistic fervor. She roared right back at him, sinking her teeth into the other man's ear and tearing away a chunk.

“Like zombies.” Ted uttered, watching on. “28 Days Later zombies, to be exact. Zombies with get-up-and-go.” He corrected himself. “Danny Boyle has something to answer to…”

Ted checked the time for the Bug’s ETA. Still 7 minutes. Time was crawling. He was dressed, stressed and ready for success. He looked down at his work table. The circuit board was ready, but he had no casing. It still had some basic functionality though. He tore into a cupboard and started looking for things to work with, finding the complimentary Hotel Room hairdryer. He rushed over to the desk and took it apart with a screwdriver. He took the circuitboard and some caulk and worked magic. Finishing with the gun he left it to dry as best it could. He checked the time once more. 3 minutes. He pulled open his wrist controls in his gloves and found some wire and grabbed the soldering iron and set to work on Plan B. Working as fast as he could, he used his spare seconds within tasks to hangup his phone from its video chat, and sent a text message to Hank and Jan via voice command.

“Lockdown the compound. Seal yourself in the Clean Room and I’ll get to you when I can. Stay safe.”

His thoughts strayed to hoping Tora was OK, as well as her friend Bea. He had no way to contact them yet. Then those same thoughts spread to Tony Stark, then Norman Osborn, then his son Harry, then-- He shook his head. This wasn’t useful. Dwelling on individuals could only cloud things right now when he needed the most focus.

There was a loud banging on the door.

“Ted! TED! Are you in there! They’re evacuating us down to Meeting Room spaces in the Lobby!” Murray yelled.

“Is he in there?” He could hear Jeremiah ask on the other side of the door.

“I don’t know. I left my phone back in the room and I’m not going back in there now. He left early yesterday, maybe he did the same again today. No way he didn’t hear me…” Ted could hear their voices shrinking as they followed the evacuation procedures for the Hotel. Ted sighed and kept working, finally finishing and checking the time.

30 seconds. Better get ready.

Ted carefully lifted his hamfisted new B.B. gun and holstered it gently. His arm still hurt, doctors had said he had a hairline fracture to one rib, his weapon of choice was untested and held together with fresh caulk, a cheap hairdryer casing, four screws and prayers, he had no idea who he was fighting, what they were or why. But he had a direction.

Central Park.

The Bug’s skywire dropped down to his balcony. Ted stood on the bars and retracted the cable. As it carried him up to the safety of the Bug he watched the pandemonium breaking out on the street far below, fighting too chaotic to even call a series of brawls.

He thought back to what Abner Jenkins had said about him the previous night. ‘An immature reaction to an imperfect world’. He thought about Murray and Jeremiah and hoped they could at least get to ground level as he saw wild people throwing themselves from buildings multiple stories up with no sense of self preservation. He thought about Tora and Bea and how different they had been from the man in the metal armour. He thought about Rosa who turned over his Hotel bed, Mike who had helped him with his bags, Julia who checked him in on arrival. He thought about all of the people, and how he knew he would remember them all, and in that instant confirmed there was nothing immature about this response at all.

For a man in his position it’s the only common sense response to a world bad men make imperfect.
*cue Abra Kadabra arc*
END OF SEASON AWARDS:

◼ BEST CHARACTER CONCEPT

Baal, The Flash, Guardians of the Galaxy, Old Man Grayson and Robin the Toy Wonder, The Shadow


These are the off-the-wall ideas, notions that have made me look at the game, double-take on the character sheet and wonder how they’re going to be pushed forward. Unfortunately a few happened late in the season with limited opportunities to see them really flesh out until next season (The Shadow and Baal). It was incredibly difficult to hold my tongue as time zones and good fortune saw Endgame drop down my neck of the woods first, when the finishing point in the movie seemed to have snatched [@HenryJonesJnr]’s character sheet straight off the boards.

It was a tight two man race between @Hillan’s Thawne Flash and @Bounce’s Commish Dick and the Boytoy. And since it comes down to a race, I’m going to give Thawne the edge… slightly… by a rapidly telescoping robotic boy’s nose.




◼ BEST CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT


Captain Marvel, Daredevil, Magik, Static, Wonder Woman (*Bonus honourable mention Green Arrow)


Going on a curve here – this is the character’s who have seen change, growth or depth built to them over the course of the season. I gave @Dblade26’s Green Arrow a bonus honourable mention for the rate of change despite such a late start. Which I’m now regretting since I selected my 5s before writing the actual award descriptions and I’m just now realizing he showed up everywhere anyway…

Bounce’s Billy had great depth built to him as we caught glimpses of an immortal alien altered God-like child referenced over half a century. We saw Daredevil actually shown fear and pushed beyond his breaking point. Magik has experienced great trauma and is trying to meet that past head on with a little help from her friends. Static had a full character arc where he faced a life with diminished powers and whether it was ever really the power or the man. Wonder Woman, like Daredevil, was pushed to breaking point as well, and we’ve seen it early enough that we’re watching her experience the consequences of those actions, and the way she chooses to face tomorrow after them.

I’m going to give this one to Static. I think this might be a sleeper to some people, but to me… I think it was a major theme throughout @The Bork Lazer’s arc as a whole, and was handled brilliantly.




◼ BEST SEASON


@webboysurf. @Bounce. @Lord Wraith. @Roman. @Natty.

I’ve worked these awards a bit different. Best season to me is IC content. Posts. By all characters combined. If you’ve put out quality production with more than one, frankly it’s going to help. These have been the engine that’s kept the thread moving.

I’ve got a 3 horse race between @Bounce, @webboysurf and @Roman. Wraith has kept the game moving with beautifully detailed posts over a few varied characters. Natty (and Hexflexagon, honestly… there was a hair’s breadth between 5 and 6) maintained individual characters throughout the whole season, producing wonderfully detailed posts in the magic corner as well.

This one’s brutal… but, I think Bounce has to just edge this one out. He’s managed to spin plates and provide a full Grayson and Toy Wonder on limited time, whilst still pushing forward with Billy relentlessly. Webbs finished strong with Arsenal, and has locked down an action niche. Whilst Roman finished STRONG with Daredevil, but lacked time to work in Constantine with the season waning.




◼ BEST STORY ARC


Ragged Souls by Magik. Welcome to the Masquerade by Batman. Static + Shockers (not the name… try it on though). Queen’s Heir by Green Arrow. Homecoming by Zatanna (is that Zatanna’s arc name?)


Running out of time at work. Keep it short. These have all been major strengths in this season. The magic corner, Lord Wraith world-building and Bork’s character development. I’m giving the nod to Bork’s Static who made good use of the full season.




◼ BEST POST


Static’s finale. First post of The Shadow. Daredevil vs Kingpin.


All three of these were epic masterpieces. I put down 3 because I couldn’t keep it to 5. After these 3 there was no natural cut-off to me. All three actually made me verbalize when I was reading them (think along the lines of “Oh shit!”, “Whoa!, or similar…)

That said, long story short, this is getting unfair. @Byrd Man knows how to strike joy in my heart, just as he knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men...




◼ BEST ANTAGONIST


The Mad Hatter by @Lord Wraith. Kingpin by @Roman. Brick by Ben Folds Five @Dblade26. Electrocutioner by @The Bork Lazer. The Suit by @DocTachyon.


I feel frustrated, because I know I’ve gone early and Wraith isn’t done with The Mad Hatter…

I like subtlety, which is why the Black suit got a mention. Thought Doc’s done a good job with the odd inflection, bringing an insidious presence that’s wearing away at Pete without being outright overbearing. The other three brought it home strong at the end of arcs. I’m going to give the slight nod to Brick (and thank God… because we know Connor’s got a pretty limited rogues gallery to pick from) as the multi-faceted top-dog who has been holding back the torrent of chaotic unfettered crime in Star City, but has to prove a point.




◼ BEST SUPPORTING CAST


Blade’s Supporting Cast by [@SimpleUnicycle]. Captain America’s Supporting Cast by @webboysurf. Magik’s by @Natty. Spider-Man’s by [@Doc Tachyon]. Valor’s by @Ceta de Cloyes.


Making me pick between Tasky and the Spider-gang… you monsters.

Ugghhhhhhhhhhhhhh… Spidey.

Shout out to Ceta’s great work in limited time though and I’m looking forward to the Legion’s expansion next season. And of course Uni’s supporting cast for Blade – a man who shares my own taste in the humour of seeing the star get regular comeuppance at the hands of that supporting crew.




◼ BEST WORLD BUILDING


Namor by Lord Wraith… Hup, you played yourself. Captain Marvel by @Bounce. Magik by @Natty. Zatanna’s by @Hexaflexagon. Supergirl’s Metropolis by @inkarnate. Guardians of the Galaxy by [@HenryJonesJnr]. Special mention: Teen Titans by @Retired


Wraith… you had this! Those Namor Atlantis posts were masterpieces and you not only threw in the towel, you deleted them!

Love it when any of these drop. Doesn’t happen often, but you won’t find people up for this one rushing stuff. These guys are the prestige Oscar chasers (although this isn’t Cannes, @inkarnate, and we don’t give awards for short pictures!) Worth a mention, Retired, who had a late start and ate into his own time helping out, reviewing others’ posts.

I’m going with nnnnnnnnnggg! Magik. So tough though.




◼ BEST CROSSOVER


Arrows Red and Green. Spidey and the X-Men. A Couple of Old Wardogs.


I think these just got better as the season wore on. I’m going with Red and Green Arrow.

Bears mentioning though… Doc is a joy to work with, and tolerates my foibles with aplumb.




◼ THE ABSOLUTE BREAKOUT CHARACTER


Green Arrow. Old Man Grayson and the Toy Wonder. Arsenal. Raven. Blade.


These are the characters that raised the eyebrows. Surpassed my expectations in terms of where I thought my interest would be. I like Raven as a Titan, but have struggled reading solo comics with her before. Blade seldom interests me in the comics (although the first two movies surpassed the comic material to me)… but I should have known better, because Uni finds a way to keep interest. Connor’s probably down the list on archer’s to me, Dblade then compounded that with Felicity… and then somehow made it far surpass what any combination of the parts should have any right to be. Likewise, I’m not terribly into post-Speedy Roy. Again, webs made it work.

But I’m still trying to figure out what the Hell happened to bestow Old Man Grayson and Robin the Toy Wonder upon us all… and I’ve got nothing.




◼ THE ABSOLUTE MVP


@webboysurf. @Lord Wraith. @Retired. @Inkarnate. [@Saint Maxx]. @Hillan.

These are the people who inspire activity. Whether it is from post frequency, pushing on conversation about character work and posts as a whole, reviews, or a combination of any or all of these.

Retired’s had a colossal impact on the game since his late start, and the sacrifices which cost him a legitimate chance at the World Building award are basically what wins him this one to me.
Very early preliminary stuff, don't put it up yet. I'll tinker with it over the next few days.

------------------



Earlier...


So here’s the layout. K.O.R.D’s part of the display floor is over here.

All of the future senior partners of the Farley Fleeter Advertising Agency leaned forward to study the schematics of the Jacob K. Javits Convention Center.

“Where’s the suit?” Asked the copyboy.

Well if all things go according to plan, then it will likely be either here, in the trunk of this car K.O.R.D’s setting up on the showroom. Or here. Fleeter pointed at different spots on the map, and then stood up and walked away whilst everyone else looked closer at where he had been pointing.

“What if it’s none of these? What if someone’s wearing it? You know, for a demonstration?”

Good point. I’ve organized a pulse rifle, stowed off in the fire hose segment that’s marked with an ‘X’. So just to make things clear. Five on the floor, or four of you and myself. Sixth is the wheelman. And then we have one here watching the main door, floating in case cops or capes have a faster response time than we’ve planned. The name of the game is efficiency and speed. The five enter in costume disguise at the marked egress points, re-group on the pulse rifle ‘X’. We then move quickly to the K.O.R.D segment of the floor. We fire once to cause disruption and a show of force. Then we only use the threat of the pulse rifle to get the location of the B.E.E.T.L.E suit out of them. If they give up the suit, we take it, nobody gets hurt. The five exit here to the car. The pulse rifle then is used only as a deterrent to prevent anyone following. The floater gets the door. The six get in the van. We leave. Speed and efficiency. Farley Fleeter said as he swirled his rye, standing off to the side and talking through the plan.

Alternatively, the B.E.E.T.L.E suit is being worn in a demonstration. This gets more messy and we have to be ready for it. The five with the pulse rifle enter. We blast the suit. The five create multiple targets. Our keys to success here are speed, agility and creating confusion. We blast a hole in the suit. We carry the suit out with the body still in it between four of us, with the fifth using the pulse rifle to maintain the deterrent. The floater gets the door. We put the armour in the van and go.

Fleeter drained his glass, before he continued.

Messy. Undesirable. But we have to be ready for the possibility.

The Ad men looked at each other.

“We’re going to have to shoot someone?” One of the two phone bank workers asked.

Well, we’re certainly going to be firing the pulse rifle. I want that understood by all of you right now. If only because the initial show of force will keep bystanders from doing anything stupid. I’ve got a place out past Albany where we can practise fire it. Get everyone here used to the kick and the sound. But if someone’s in the suit, yes. I can’t see anyway around shooting them to take the suit. It’s supposed to be extremely durable though. So just because we down the suit doesn’t mean we’ve killed whoever’s wearing it. Who knows, maybe we can strip them out of the suit in the van and dump them on the way.

Farley Fleeter dropped in more ice and poured himself another. He turned and addressed the elephant in the room, which made everyone uncomfortable.

But yes. We don’t stop shooting until the suit stops moving. There’s no way around that.

* * * * *


N E W Y O R K S C I E N C E E X P O

Present Day, Earlier Tonight | Jacob K. Javits Convention Center, Manhattan, New York

Ted lifted his head gingerly. He could hear screaming, a firefight and the din of a fleeing crowd. Everything happens so fast. He pushed himself up onto his forearms. So much happens you can barely understand how you act or why. That’s why Ted strangely peered out across the showroom floor, he saw colourful crazies bouncing around trying to take down the B.E.E.T.L.E suit. He saw the huge clock across the other side of the showroom. He saw wafting heat rise off of their weapon’s blast, and from the suit’s rocket boots.

Ted looked to the left and right of him. The Stark model who had been on the car had sensibly fled. He grunted, took his tuxedo and shirt off and tore the white undergarment clear off. He put his gloves on with some care and peeked over the platform again to survey the fight. He pulled his cowl on and snapped his B.B. gun back together. Ready for action.

With armoured suits and pulse rifle fire? Maybe not.

Ted inhaled and exhaled deeply. His side hurt from being slammed into the wall, but there was no time to dwell on that. He hurdled the platform, and felt another blast of heat coming from his left. For a second Ted thought his goose was cooked and he’d lost track of the number of coloured costumed fighters, but this was something else again. The green haired woman who had been with Stark was now completely ablaze with emerald coloured flame. She sent a blast after the pulse rifle, whilst Ted sprinted for cover.

Ted dived and rolled behind a partition. He turned and found himself looking at two of the colourful costumed fighters. Ted let out a bright flash from his B.B. gun, stunning both. He fired out a tazer line into one, dropping a purple and yellow faced goon, whilst kicking the other green and red one in the chest. The Blue Beetle dropped the tazer unit as the purple and yellow one still convulsed, and loaded another fresh electrical cartridge into his B.B. gun.

The fight started to sweep back across the showroom, and Ted took cover as it came back towards him, readying himself for his next move. He let them pass before stepping out and firing a sonic blast from his B.B. gun, knocking another two off balance, following up with an acrobatic combination of kicks and punches. Pain seized up his arm. The green flamed metahuman looked at him and he waved her through to the final leader of these colourful crooks and the B.E.E.T.L.E suit, where they were blasting at one another with powerful weapons by the platform with the two cars. She laid down covering fire as the Blue Beetle rushed up. He fired another Sonic burst at the solid metal suit to no effect, before turning his B.B. gun back on the Madmen’s leader.

...but it had no juice left. Ted threw the B.B. gun in desperation and scrambling, he dove for the platform. The pulse rifle was swung in his direction. The Blue Beetle found the key fob and turned. Letting out a sonic blast that launched the Ad man a solid dozen feet, where he fell in a crumpled heap.

Ted rocked his head back and breathed a sigh of relief. He saw the clock once more.

“Hey! Aaa--aaay you!” Ted yelled to the man in the B.E.E.T.L.E armour. Covering poorly for his knowledge of the man in the armoured outfit.

The B.E.E.T.L.E’s rocket boots fired up as he went to make his hasty getaway through the ceiling once more.

“Nope… not going to happen.” Ted looped a length of cable around the armour and ducked away from the jet boots’ blast, clinging to the cable. He’d turned away too slowly, however, as the jet blast scorched part of his cowl. The B.E.E.T.L.E soared up through the hole in the roof, with Kord in tow by cord. Once the pair burst through the roof, Ted let go, not wanting to be dropped at high altitude. He performed a gymnastic tuck and roll on top of the roof, finding his way back to his feet and glared at the flying suit.

“ABE!” He yelled. Not caring who knew anymore. Far above the Convention Center and unable to be heard over the din of the city below.

The suit stopped and hovered.

“AAAAAAABE!”


The helmet of the B.E.E.T.L.E looked back over its shoulder. It was a truly terrifying sight.

Ted hurt. His left lens was covered with black soot. He was starting to think he’d probably broken a rib or two when he was slammed against the wall by the armour, and he’d hurt his arm punching one of the colourful Madmen in the face. He cradled his sore arm to take the pressure off, as if it were in a sling.

The B.E.E.T.L.E floated back towards him. Your father. Abner said, as the helmet opened up.

Respect for your father is the only reason I let you walk away. He was a great man. He built something brilliant. And you’re destroying it by inches.

Ted tilted his head back and opened his mouth to say something, and stopped and sighed instead. Apparently either too sore or too tired to respond.

You thought I didn’t know who you were? Even if you weren’t using THAT tech, even if you didn’t go diving for the keys knowing exactly how they worked, EVEN if this wasn’t the EXACT kind of immature reaction to an imperfect world that anyone who knows you would expect from you… You came up from behind me after I knocked you against the wall in the corner. You were the only one there. Jenkins’ voice smacked with the contempt of a man dealing with an unruly child.

Ted willed himself to respond. “Wow. That’s really smart, Abe. So what’s the play? Suddenly the world sees how effective your suit can be. The demand tilts for your suit? Suddenly you’re pressuring me with the shareholders response?”

They’ve seen it, Ted. It worked with Stark and his Iron Man. It’ll work with us. That’s what you never understood. Fortune favours the bold, Kord. You never learned that. You’re a lousy executive. Abner Jenkins felt better, larger as he said all of the things he’d felt and wanted to say, but had bottled up for so long.

Ted looked off to the distance, his head rolling. He looked exhausted. Cooked. “You’re right.” He mumbled.

What was that? Jenkins called back, holding a metal glove to his ear, he would relish this moment. Just trying to make sure I heard you right.

“7 minutes, 37.4 seconds. 42,200 Newton force.” Ted muttered.

What?! Jenkins yelled back across the rooftop, now really not having heard what Kord was saying.

“You’re right. I’m a lousy executive. I’ve been scrapping and hustling and trying to learn on the run.”

“...but I’m one Hell of an engineer. And I remember things I see. Like the early schematics for your B.E.E.T.L.E armour. Capable of generating 42,200 Newton force. Designed for dealing with different gravity and pressure levels than we would normally experience. For interplanetary travel.”

What are you--

“And a vehicle travelling at Mach 3, from Boston to New York, as the crow flies, allowing for getting to safe altitude for supersonic travel, take-off included. My math has that at 7 minutes 34, 35, 36…”

Wait-- what have you-- HNNNNN! Abner was suddenly slapped from behind by a large metal disc and jerked upwards.

“What you’re experiencing now is an industrial electromagnet which I juiced up a bit. Regular junkyard crane can generate 1 Tesla, or about 13,000 to 13,340 Newton force. This one here? 5 Tesla. You may not like what I say, but you can’t fight physics and raw mathematics.” Ted started to walk gingerly across the rooftop towards the man in the metal suit.

“The reason I let you talk so much Abner, is because this is your exit interview. I’m extremely disappointed with you. I can’t stress that enough.”

Struggling in vain with no success whatsoever, Abner Jenkins completely lost his cool. Errraargh! Forget what I said about your father! I’m going to kill you! I’m going to make it my--

“No, you’re not, Abner. You’re going to drop this, like you should have when it first came up. Do you know why?” Ted walked right up next to his spread eagle former CFO. “Because at the moment, I’m going to make sure Mim’s still gets access to your 401k. You know I don’t have to. You know that… all of this... Certainly justifies pulling that away from you. But I’m not going to. You put in decades of good work. Work for your family. You’ve already made me do more than I wanted to, Jenkins. Please. Let it end here.”

Abner Jenkins scowled, his anger was palpable.

“It’s been a long day, and I’m tired.” Ted said. “But if I so much as get an inkling that you’re not done with this, I will pull it. I'm not a vindictive man, but that's my leverage here. I need you to convince me.”

There was a few seconds of hesitation, but that was just ego. Abner didn’t have a play here and he knew it.

Alright. He relented with a grizzled tone. You won’t get any moves made against you from me.

Ted put his head back and sighed. “I don’t like how you phrased that, but I guess if nobody leaves happy then we’ve probably got a good deal.”

So you’re going to let me down now? He asked.

“What? No.” Ted chuckled. “No, I’m not letting you go now. I’m letting you go down there, where the police are interested in knowing all parties who opened fire in a crowded convention hall. But you will have access to the best lawyers K.O.R.D can buy. We’ll do what we can do for you, but then you’re going to serve whatever time you’re due, and then you’re going to resign.”

“None of these points are negotiable. But you do all that, you keep your pension and stock options. I’ll see to it.”

Abner Jenkins looked at him with skepticism. Upside down skepticism. Whilst being stuck to a disc.

“What? What are you looking at me like that for?” Ted asked. “Are you really going to suggest that the board wouldn’t see it as in character for me to make a soft move like let you keep your pension and portfolio? That’s what got us in this mess in the first place.”

Jenkins snorted. Then chuckled. Then broke down and outright laughed.

Ted stepped back and started to remote control the Bug and it’s electromagnet, lowering it to the street far below.

“Hello.” A soft feminine voice came from behind him.

The Blue Beetle jerked around with a start and clutched his heart, before feeling relieved when he saw who it was. It was the woman in the blue cocktail dress from earlier. “Geez-- Don’t do that! You nearly gave me a heart attack.”

“You did well.” She said in a Scandinavian accent.

“Uhh, thanks?” Ted replied, going back to lowering the electromagnet. “I guess?”

“This is going to sound like a strange request. But I’m going to have to ask you to strip down.”

“Umm, I’m flattered I guess. But no.”

“Ah. You don’t understand. You see. I froze the doors down there, but eventually they are going to get through. The police and paramedics. And when they do, they are going to expect to see Mr Ted Kord down there, behind that car, wearing his tuxedo. And when they do, they’re going to take him away and put him in an ambulance for precautionary reasons. And then they will find… well.” She gestured to his costume.

“Ah, I see. Well, even then, I still can’t just GIVE you my outfit. You must think I’m pretty dumb to just hand over my gear to one of Tony Stark’s girls.”

“Ugh.” She winced. “I am NOT one of Tony Stark’s girls. I’m a member of the Global Guardians, a section of the international taskfor-- you know what, you don’t need to know that. In short, I work for a group who protect key private citizens and diplomatic figures of importance. Mr Stark was involved in some… complications with the nation of Trasnia. But, if you know anything about Mr Stark, he can be a most difficult man. He was refusing the services of the Global Guardians unless he got to hand-pick his protectors.” The young woman explained.

“So he picked two based on how good you both look in--”

“Ugh. Yes. He is a pig. My partner Bea seems to be a lot more willing to play along, you saw her earlier.”

“Green flame girl.” Ted described.

“Yes. That’s her. She was resolving the situation whilst I made sure Mr Stark safely got to his car and away.”

Ted made sure the police had Abner Jenkins secured safely on the ground below, before turning off the electromagnet, and raising its line back up into the Bug far above him.

“That may well even be the case, but I still don’t know anything about you. You come here with Tony Stark, and now you’re trying to take my suit.” He further explained his reservations.

“My name is Tora Olafsdotter, and when I work they call me Ice Maiden.”

She walked over to the hole in the roof and created an ice slide down to the showroom below.

“Ted Kord, I promise you I’ll return your outfit as soon as all of this calms down.” She looked at him and seemed sincere, but Ted looked back at her with no small amount of skepticism. He sent the Bug home on autopilot and logged his glove command out. The only way to remote control the Bug now would be to reconnect the glove’s circuitry to the system by reinstating the signal. Which should be too difficult to crack, if anyone was interested in doing so in the first place.

Ted removed his cowl, he removed the rest of his Blue Beetle suit, leaving it at her feet on the roof as he stood in his boxer shorts in the night time chill, more than a little self conscious.

“My B.B. gun should be down there too.” Ted said, pointing down to roughly where he dropped it.

Tora and Ted slid down to the showroom floor, where Ted began to get dressed again.

“I can’t see it.” Tora said.

“It should be near the unconscious guy with the red face and the yellow wig. In the techni-colour dream shirt.” He said, not looking as he pulled up his pants.

“There’s no one here like that. In fact. None of those multi-coloured people are here.”

Ted sighed, of course they got away. “Yeah, your friend’s not here either.”

“Bea? She's probably just checked in on Stark.”

“You don’t have comms?” Ted asked, tapping his ear.

“We did, but when she flames… Pffft! Tora made a sound effect simulating the ear piece going up in flames.

“Well, that should be easy enough to counter just by using-- Sorry. Not the time.” Ted censored the engineering side of his brain.

Tora was turning over fallen objects and debris. “You’re taking having your tech stolen very well for someone who just a few minutes ago wouldn’t trust me with his outfit.”

“It’s no biggie. I can whip up another one pretty quickly, and the B.B. gun’s no good without me anyway. It’s just an expensive paperweight to anybody else.” He said, buttoning up his shirt.

“The ‘B.B. gun’?” Tora asked, smiling at him.

“Yeah.” Ted’s cheeks flushed. “You were around Stark long enough. Boys and our toys. Overcompensating. Giving them names.”

“Well from what I can tell, you are nothing like Tony Stark. And whether you believe it or not, that’s a good thing.”

Ted’s face turned a darker shade of red. And not just because the top button on his tailored shirt was a little tighter than comfortable as he re-tied his tie.

“I think you’re right. It’s gone. You’re going to have to back up your talk now and make yourself another one.”

“That’s alright. It’ll give me something to do in my hotel room. It’s good to have a hobby.”

Tora nodded, and straightened up, hands on her hips.

“I should get out of here. Make sure we get your B.B. Suit clear from when the police get here and do their sweep. Did I say that right?”

“No, it doesn’t work like that. B.B. gun is a play on words. You know ‘Pew! Pew!’ like the kid’s toy?” Ted said, making finger-guns.

“Wow. You really weren’t joking. Boys and their toys.” She replied with a smile, forming another layer on her ice slide to carry her back up through the roof. Ted sat on the cars’ platform and watched her go. He gave a smile and a feeble wave as she slid through the roof and away.

A few minutes later, the police and medical emergency services breached the frozen door.

* * * * *


H O M E W O O D S U I T E S B Y H I L T O N N Y / M I D T O W N

Later That Night | Manhattan, New York

Ted was sitting at a small table in his hotel room, working out the rudimentary circuitry for a new B.B. gun. A lamp lit his work. He’d answered a battery of questions first from paramedics, then from police and finally from Murray Takamoto. One of which was “I saw you dive over to save that car model, did you get her number?” Followed by several more tips and suggestions along the lines of “OK, but you should have got her number.” completely oblivious or insensitive to the mayhem that had been unfolding around them at the time.

Abner Jenkins was being held at the local precinct. The B.E.E.T.L.E suit taken as evidence. Ted had kept his word, he’d made the calls and organized a legal team for him and handled early media obligations well. “Well, Abner Jenkins has been a hard worker and a good man known to my company, and furthermore my family, for 4 decades. Can we even be certain that he was the one responsible for this? At this point we’re doing all we can to get to the bottom of what exactly happened tonight, and until we have more information it just doesn’t make sense to comment at this time.” Using his minor injuries as an excuse for not talking further.

It was a late night, and had been a long day, but with how it ended he still had an adrenaline spike. Which is why he was still tinkering away, despite medical advice that he get a good night’s sleep. His phone had been blowing up with well wishes and friends checking on him, but short of a form reply that explained his few injuries and wish to get some rest he’d largely been leaving it unattended.

Suddenly a crisp wrapping on his door broke the stark silence and smell of hot metal. Ted got to his feet and looked through his peephole and saw nobody there. He stepped away from the door and thought for a second. He went back to the table and grabbed the hot soldering iron, unplugging the cord and wrapping it around his arm. It was a poor weapon, but here he was starved for choice. He grabbed the door handle and yanked the heavy door open part of the way...

And came face to face with Tora. She was off duty now and wearing plain clothes.

“Hi?” He stammered out.

“I was tossing up whether I should just leave the paper bag here and just knock and walk away, but then Bea said I wouldn’t have the guts to come up here and see you again, so…” Tora wrestled with her explanation.

Ted looked down both lengths of the hallway and finished what he hoped was her sentence for her. “Also it’s a paper bag containing… that… and if I didn’t hear you knock it would probably be best if it weren’t just left sitting there for some employee or someone else staying at the hotel to find?”

“We got fired.”

“What?”

“Well, I got fired. Bea kind of just blew up and quit afterwards.”

Ted opened the door to his room and gestured for Tora to come in. She obliged and stepped inside.

“What were you going to do with that?” She laughed, pointing at the soldering iron he was gripping, with it’s cord wrapped around his arm.

“I don’t know. I got a knock I wasn’t expecting. No one was there when I looked through the peephole. I’ve had enough people today trying to kill me. So how’d you lose your job?”

“Oh. I put Stark in his car, it was already full of Stark Industries private security so I left him with them to get him safe and clear.”

“And that didn’t work? One of them was a kidnapper?”

“What? Oh no. He’s fine. It’s the Global Guardians. Standards say I should have kicked one of his security workers out and taken their place so they still had representation to ensure his safety. It was never going to happen. Not quickly anyway. Like I said Stark has a tendency to be difficult. Ugh. This job has suuuuuuuucked.”

“You explained all this to them?”

“No. Well, Bea did. Loudly. And with a lot of Portugese words that don’t bear translating. She can get pretty protective.”

“I’d hope so. Otherwise you two were in the wrong business.” Tora laughed. “So what are you going to do?”

“Well, I don’t know. Any openings in your security detail?” Tora asked in jest, but her unfamiliar Norwegian accent failing to sell the joke to Ted.

“No. We contract out.” Ted said, before an idea sprang into his mind. “But what if I could find something better? Something where you can see the positive tangible difference you’re making on the world everyday?”

“Flying around with you and your little B.B. gun and suit. ‘Pew!’ ‘Pew!’ I don’t know. That’s not really a job, and Bea can have some expensive tastes.”

“I might not be Tony Stark, but I should be able to set something up. Steady wage. I’ve already had some thoughts about Headquarters/Accommodation…”

“Well, what would we call ourselves?”

Ted thought back over the whole night. The ordeal with his company’s flagship product.

“I don’t know, but please don’t make me name it…” He said, rubbing his head at the thought.

“You’re serious about this?”

“Well… yeah.”

“I don’t know what to say.”

“Well, you probably shouldn’t say anything yet anyway. Go talk it over with Bea, I’ll set some things in motion, and we’ll see.”

An uncomfortable silence filled the room as the pair both realized they were alone in his room. Tora had a look around the Hotel room looking for something to distract from the silence, her eyes falling on the table set-up with the circuitry. “Is that--?”

“Yep. Just got started. I told you it wouldn’t take me long.”

“Wow. You’re really in on all of this. OK. I guess I’ll talk to Bea about it.” She quickly said, flustered and walking to the door.

“OK. Well, I hope I hear from you soon.” Ted said earnestly, opening the door for her.

“You will.” She replied. The pair were standing awkwardly close to one another in the door frame, Ted with a goofy grin on his face. Tora went up on her tiptoes and gently pecked a quick kiss on his cheek, after which she smiled awkwardly before rushing off. “See you soon! We’ll talk soon! When I see you next, we’ll talk!” Ted watched her hurry down the hallway to the elevator, wondering what just happened.

He went back inside and closed the door, his head bowed in introspection trying to figure things out.

“Did I-- Did I just get a super secret-- a secret super girlfriend?” He beamed, chuckling to himself. Before a thought jumped into his brain and made him stop.

“Oh God… If I ever screw this up she’s going to turn me into an ice cube!”



N E W Y O R K S C I E N C E E X P O

Present Day | Jacob K. Javits Convention Center, Manhattan, New York

Ted Kord walked quickly down 11th Avenue in the early evening. He still had his Blue Beetle suit on underneath his brand new tux, albeit now obscured by an extra layer of undergarment quickly put together by one Janet van Dyne. It cleverly concealed the telltale colours and shape of the suit, giving him a smoother contour, but added an extra half inch to his suit size compared with if he were wearing nothing at all underneath. Gloves and cowl zipped into internal pockets, as well as the BB gun broken down to flat components and tucked away as well. She’d done a marvellous job, truly remarkable given how little time she had to work with.

Still, his appearance had yet to have to stand up to any real test, although it would now. Tony Stark was standing out the front of the Convention Center, once again flanked by the same two beauties he’d seen him with on the television earlier. One a beautiful caramel skinned South American bombshell with striking green hair. She had matched this feature perfectly with the bare minimum amount of material required to qualify as a cocktail dress in a complementary green shade. An emerald necklace plunging deep into the neckline - as if that region needed anymore attention - completed the ensemble. The other appeared far more fair skinned. Ted might guess Scandinavian or East European, maybe even Russian. With a straight white bob cut. She wore a far more subdued royal blue cocktail dress, but still looked just as phenomenal as any female company Tony Stark usually surrounded himself with.

“Kord.” He said, approaching him with a hand out. An expression on his face that Ted couldn’t quite pinpoint between a smirk and a smile, but full of unmistakable self-confidence. “...I see you’ve been making great time.” Ted took his hand and shook it. “A dad-bod whilst still in your early twenties. Impressive.”

There it is. Ted could almost feel the flop sweat drop and instantly soak both pits. Still OK. Keep your cool and stick a comeback.

“Yeah, nice work with the Dali.” Ted said, ending the handshake and rubbing his chin.

“This isn’t a Dali. That’s a long thin moustache that curls at the ends. You’re thinking of a Zappa...”

“Yes!” Ted blurted out, pointing his finger slightly too excited. “Ha!” With a grin as if he’d somehow “Got” Tony Stark.

“Except this isn’t a Zappa either.” There was no mistaking the expression now. Smirk all the way.

“Men’s Health Weekly call this a ‘Stark’. It’s flattering, and let’s face it, perfectly descriptive, but perhaps a little over the top. You know how those Men’s style magazines get…”

Ted could see the retort coming. Time seemed to crawl. The girls Stark was with almost seemed to feel sorry for him now and that was the worst part of all.

“...or maybe not.” Stark tapped him twice on the stomach and turned around and went inside, followed by the two models who fortunately didn’t spare him a look-behind pity glance. “I’ll see you in there.”

Ted slouched deeply. God dammit.

* * * * *


Ted eventually skulked back to K.O.R.D’s segment of the showroom, tail between his legs.

“Ted! Over here!” Murray Takamoto waved him over. “Where the Hell have you been?”

“Some things came up. Needed my attention. How’s everything here?” Ted asked. Murray and Jeremiah Duncan looked considerably relieved to finally see him.

“Mmmmmmokay?” Murray answered, looking to Jeremiah for support.

“That sounded more like a question than a statement, and it makes me nervous. Where are we? What’s happened to the product?”

“Oh good. You’re asking that question.” Replied Murray with an uncomfortably large grin on his face. “The product itself is fine.”

“Yes. We must stress the product is absolutely fine. Perfect working order. It’s set up in that Beamer over there.” Reaffirmed Jeremiah, pointing to a maroon BMW parked across the floor in a corner of the showroom..

“That’s it over there?” Asked Ted. “Next to the blue Testarossa?”

“Yes. It was the original model made over in--” They both confirmed before Ted cut them off.

“Why is there is a multi-million dollar blue Testarossa parked next to what we’re using to market our product? Waitaminute-- the original was red, how do you get Ferrari of all companies to paint their original model blue?”

“I guess if you’re Tony Stark then people will--” Jeremiah elbowed Murray and gave him a disappointed look for running his mouth.

“Stark? But-- He’s got nothing to do with cars? Why’s he got a blue Testarossa here?”

Ted rushed over to get a closer look. The pair waited until he came back, heads bowed.

“Are you kidding me?!?”

Murray and Jeremiah looked on sheepishly.

“It doesn’t have anything to do with anything! He’s painted a work of art a crass blue, slapped on a Stark Industries decal and he’s got some model writhing around on the hood taking pictures with anyone who wants one!”

“We can only control what we can control, Ted.” Jeremiah replied, attempting to sooth the CEO. “People will see it for what it is. Cheap attention grabbing tactics.”

“I saw Jeff Jarvis over there! He’s a major geek journalist and weblogger and he’s taking thumbs up photos with her by the car like it’s Spring Break! The man took down Dell!”

“Jeremiah’s right. We can only run our race.” Murray replied.

“Well, at least now I know why you were both being evasive… You didn’t want me to see that.”

“Well, I’m going to take this opportunity to go to the toilet, while you tell him. This is why they pay you the big bucks.” Murray said to Jeremiah, as he quickly walked away.

“Don’t you go getting a photograph with her, Takamoto!”

Murray quickly did an aboutface and walked back past the pair in the opposite direction. “Sorry. Toilet’s this way.” Ted scowled at him all the way.

“Spill it…” Ted said to Jeremiah once Murray was gone, folding his arms and looking down on the smaller executive.

“Randall Truman called. The focus group fell through so we still don’t have a name. All we know is that we can’t call it--”

“The Carjack Off.”

“Yes. That.”

Ted pinched his brow deeply in frustration.

“Ted, you can’t kill him.” The Chief Operations Officer reminded him.

“I’m not going to kill him, Jeremiah.” He mumbled whilst deep in facepalm. “I might shave him bald and feed him each of his $5,000 suits, and the expensive Italian loafers he purchased with his undeserved senior executive salary, garnishing it generously with his own hair… but I’m not going to kill him.” He straightened back up, ready to problem-solve.

“Alright. Names. Any ideas?”

“That’s not really my kind of field of expertise, Ted.”

“Great. So I guess I’m winging it.”

“Are you sure that’s a good idea? You were the one to name it that in the first place.”

“It was a joke, Jer’. Nobody ever goes with the engineer’s name for a product. It was a dumb juvenile joke because it never matters.”

“Except in this case.”

“Yes. Except in this case.”

Ted slouched further. God dammit.

* * * * *


Mostly, however, these things were about networking. Being on the receiving end of Stark’s sarcastic jibes, having Dario Agger the head of Roxxon pretend he didn’t know who he was. At least he thought he was pretending. Ugh.

Suddenly he saw a craggly faced older gent with an unmistakable hairstyle in a dark green suit approaching him with his hand held out.

“Kord.” He said. “I’d like you to meet my son, Harry. Harry, this is Mister Ted Kord. Evidence that you’re never too young to take initiative, pull yourself up by your bootstraps and step up into a position of taking responsibility for a father’s business.”

Ted looked at the younger Osborn, who’d been gifted the same unmistakable haircut either by choice, genetics or unfortunate accident. He seemed to flinch or twitch at his father’s comment.

“Norman,” He said, shaking his hand and looking at his son with no small amount of sympathy, “and Harry. Circumstances kind of played a hand in that. I used to just be an engineer. After going to Worcester Polytechnic.” He winked at Harry. “So even ESU wouldn’t have me! So we all have our own pace, Harry.” Norman bristled.

“So what are you liking at school?” Ted asked the youth.

"I'm alright. Pretty good at chem, math, that sorta thing." Harry replied.

Norman's nose wrinkled at the comment. "With help from Mr. Parker, I'm sure."

Harry nodded slightly.

“I didn’t ask what you’re doing well in, I asked what you’re liking.” Ted prodded. “If you don’t enjoy your job you’re going to find excuses not to do it. Now again, what are you liking?”

“Well…” A wry grin started to cross Harry’s face. “We did this term on coding and programming in Computer Studies a few years back, and since then I’ve been working on some things in my spare time.” Harry took out his OsPhone. “Have you ever heard of Byerim? We’ve got it on our OzBox...” He opened up YouTube.

“Well, yes. But I’ve got it on PC... Oh don’t look at me like that Norman, PC gaming is more customizable.” But Norman was more steamed with the redirection that this conversation had taken, than any issue with Ted Kord owning one of his game consoles.

“Well, you say that. But you haven’t seen this yet…” Said Harry as he played a video uploaded by ‘LittleOz’.

“Oh you made some mods, that’s coo-- Whoa! Look how clean that is… Wait, you did this on a console? How in God’s name? That’s like it’s part of the actual game itself!”

“Yeah, I taught myself. We’ve got an OzBox toolkit, I was playing around with it, figuring things out. I made all this stuff with the OsEdits myself for console."

“This is incredible! Norman, have you seen what your kid… Norman?” But Norman Osborn had no interest in seeing what his son had done. He was storming away infuriated by the corrupting influence of what he perceived as Ted’s slacker gamer mentality. Harry dropped his head, seeing his angry father walk away, only for Ted to nudge him and cheer him up.

“You really texture this all yourself? For a console?”

Harry perked up again and grinned with pride. “Yeah.”

“Umm Mr Kord, would I be able to take a photo with you? It’d freak my friend out.”

Ted laughed a hollow laugh as much to protect his own ego as anything, he didn't know how many more shots his self esteem could take today. “Are you sure he’d even know who I am?”

“Oh yeah.” Harry said. “He’s a full blown science and tech geek. He’s already jealous my Dad gets us in here.”

Ted smiled. After all the snubs at this Expo at least he still had the die hard geeks. “Well, how about we do one better? We video chat him and really blow his mind.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, why not. I can spare the time.” He looked away to Murray and Jeremiah to make sure they didn’t need him for anything. Murray awkwardly shrugged and mouthed “What?” Ted waved him away and shook his head.

“OK. You stand over here and I’ll introduce-- no, maybe you should walk in from the side.” The two worked out the choreography of the given call for a few minutes, before Harry was satisfied enough to call his friend.

* * * * *


A few hours later the Expo opened to the general public, with only insiders, their guests and press members previously being permitted inside.

“OK Ted, I think it’s show time.” Said Jeremiah, getting his things together and ushering the CEO towards the car. Murray walked slightly behind the pair.

“The product itself is fine though, you promise me that?”

“Full working order. So keep the flash and the sonic discharging orifice away from your face.” Murray warned.

“Really? ‘Discharging orifice?’” Ted questioned.

“Don’t blame me. Marketing--”

“I got it, I got it. Focus group fell through.” Murray pushed his boss onwards.

Ted stepped up onto the platform with the car, taking a microphone and tapping the top to draw attention and check that it was working.

“Crime has been--”

Nothing. No response, barely heard over the din. Ted hit the car alarm button on the key chain and the cacophony and flashing lights drew in a small crowd who started to settle down and speak in hushed tones. Even Tony Stark and his followers turned to see what exactly was going on. For a split second he could have even sworn he saw the girl in the blue dress smile at him, before she turned away and looked around at the rest of the room, whilst returning to Stark’s side.

“Huh--” Started Ted, sitting down on the edge of the platform. “--I’m surprised that worked as well as it did. After all we’re in New York City. Who here actually turns around at the sound of a car alarm these days? It’s become background noise. The soundtrack of a city, yes?” Ted stepped down and walked around the front of the platform, looking people in the eye.

“It hasn’t helped with the crime problem at all. In fact the NYPD has said there’s evidence to suggest that it actually makes matters worse and often acts to conceal crime. To the point where there’s been conversations regarding legislation on these loud, abrasive hindrances which do little to help in our daily lives.” Ted jumped back up on the platform with a single sweeping glide-step.

“Unchanged since the 80s. Old. Stale. And frankly of questionable value. Sounds to me like someone needs to take a look at completely revolutionizing the form anti-car theft measures take place for the new century.” He turned to face the growing crowd.

“So we did. Ladies and gentlemen, I present the CJO Anti-theft system. From K.O.R.D’s laboratories to your tomorrow.”

Murray hit a few keys and a screen dropped to the floor, where demonstration videos were played.

The crowd seemed to huddle in a little more. Even Stark and his entourage seemed to be at least temporarily taken by Ted’s presentation.

“...Kord Omniversal Research and Development. Simplifying tomorrow for a better future, today.” Ted winced slightly, he’d never liked the corporate tagline marketing had come up with.

“So what exactly does it mean?” A familiar voice from the middle of the pack.

Ted started to sweat at the thought of having to explain his company’s ridiculous campaign slogan.

“Excuse me, what was that?” Ted asked, hoping to buy himself a few seconds to think.

Stark paraphrased himself. “‘CJO’. What exactly does it stand for?”

“Oh.” Said Ted, walking around the platform, trying desperately to think of something.

“Well, ‘C’ and ‘J’ stand for ‘Car’ and ‘Jacker’ respectively…”

“And the ‘O’?” Pressed Stark.

“Well, the ‘O’ stands for ‘Oooooohmygodlookouteveryone!”

It all happened so fast. That’s what people seldom realize about these hero/villain slugfests. Everything happens quickly, only the people who train to react generally do. And often things happen so fast people can barely be sure of exactly what they saw.

First, five people in brightly coloured garb pushed through the crowd. Then the weapon was drawn. Suddenly a metal figure dropped from the glass ceiling and stepped in front of Ted Kord, pushing him back firmly with a solid metal arm. Ted Kord tumbled over the hood of the car. The girl who had been on top of the blue Testarossa screamed as shards of thick glass came down. Ted dove over the car with little regard for its place in automotive history, and kept her head down away from the glass. Covering her with his tuxedo jacket.

That’s it! It’s not in the car! Yelled one of the colourful men. The weapon was lined up again. Ted ran around the car and the blast hitting the metal suit was large enough to blast him back over the car and against the back corner wall of the showroom.

He looked up just in time to see his company’s B.E.E.T.L.E suit aiming a weapon at one of these colourful men as people screamed and pandemonium broke out all around.

“Abner you lunatic. What the Hell have you done?”
I'm still alive, yes, and working on something which should be up by the weekend

But please no critiquing...looking at you, @Retired


I'll hold the door! Run!
*Hangs head in shame*
I don't want to say how many times I had to edit that OOC post...
The Making Of A Ted Kord Post:


Step One. The content is written, probably over 3 sessions. One of which is almost always spent doing nothing but staring at a blank page in my BB doc (which features basic notes, such as the names and positions of K.O.R.D employees, because I stupidly chose to give my character a perfect memory, so now I must also remember all of these fictitious people. Yes, even the ones with only a given name mentioned who have no comics backing).

Step 2. No editing. Too lazy. I go to a previous post I already wrote and “Quote” it to grab my own BB image and header coding. I paste the content from the document underneath, delete the quote tags and update the header accordingly.

Step 3. “Post Reply”. Again, no editing. No checking for errors. That’s loser talk.

Step 4. I quickly skim over the now online post, checking for obvious coding errors.

Step 5. The swearing. This happens due to the missed obvious coding errors.

Step 6. Edit post. I run over the code and repair what I noticed. Sometimes Steps 4-6 happen several times more than should happen to a person who considers themselves remotely intelligent.

Step 7. The calm before the storm. I catch up reading other stuff. Do GM work elsewhere, read other posts, IC and OOC in this thread and others. Awaiting response/notification regarding this thread and post.

Step 8. Paranoia. I have heard nothing and it’s been fifteen minutes. Maybe some of that stuff didn’t work? Have I caused offense? Did I do too little with my dialogue-driven posting style? Can the others sense my body odour through the screen whilst I sweat over this post?

Step 9. Cave and re-read my already online post. “Fuck it, I guess I’d better go look at that again.” “@Star Lord liked it but he does that before he even reads the damn posts, so that doesn’t tell me anything…”

Step 10. The swearing. This happens due to the missed obvious errors. NOTE: Last post I called Ted “Hank” 3 times in the first 2 damn paragraphs and no-one noticed, despite it having multiple likes after the first few hours.

Step 11. Edit Post. I fix the obvious errors and continue my read through. Again, Steps 9 – 11 get repeated far more times than I would like to admit to in this process.

Step 12. Broad acclaim! Congratulations, you have a successful Blue Beetle post!
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